I don't get along with his friend...

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2004
I don't get along with his friend...
2
Mon, 03-15-2004 - 4:25pm
My boyfriend is moving out at the end of the month into a new apartment with a friend, Kevin. Kevin and I never had any problems getting along until recently. (We've also never spent that much time together, until recently.)

My biggest complaint with Kevin is that he met a friend of mine and now won't stop calling her or emailing her after she's asked him to stop. It got to a point where she was incredibly uncomfortable with his attentions and my boyfriend and I were forced to intervene and ask him to stop. He finally agreed and "got the message."

My boyfriend and Kevin are now looking at apartments and clashing over major decisions. Kevin wants something out of my boyfriend's range and his current roommate told my boyfriend that Kevin can't always pay the bills each month. I think that living with Kevin sounds like its going to be a disaster, but I know its not my decision to make. However, how do I deal with my boyfriend and Kevin's friendship/living situation without going crazy??? Anyone ever have boyfriend's with nightmare friends???

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-04-2003
Mon, 03-15-2004 - 4:34pm
Without making him wrong for his decision can you ask him why with all the obvious issues with this friendship why he wants to room with this guy? Be ready to quote the red flags - obessive calling to your friend, wanting to get a place over both of their means, and his roommate saying he doesn't always pays his bills. Tell him you want to support him, yet you think you see problems on the horizon that will get increasingly harder to deal with if they move in together.


Carrie

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2003
Mon, 03-15-2004 - 5:09pm
I think you should be careful here. State what you need to and then let it go. Then let him learn this on his own so that you aren't the bad guy who nags him or says 'I told you so'. It won't take long of this guy doesn't pay the rent, etc and it seems like it is already headed that way anyway.