I guess is over, right?
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| Sat, 06-30-2007 - 5:36am |
I am sorry this is very long, but I think I need to tell the whole story. Thanks for reading. I met this guy from online dating website and we chatted for 1 month before meeting. It was great we were attracted to each other.
One thing that pissed me off was him smoking, my mum had lung cancer and I told him that smoking is bad for health and he promised that he would never smoke infront of me again. His online dating profile indicated that he was a non-smoker. I don’t understand why he has to lie. What surprised me was that he did not smoke infront me for other dates, or perhaps we didn’t spend that much time together to see him smoking or he made a point to smoke before we meet.
He is the sweetest talker that I have ever met. On the first date he would take my hand and said that “we are mean to be together”, “do u believe love at 1st sight?” On other dates he would say similar stuff and he make plans like “sign up for salsa classes”, “play squash someday”, but I know that is too early to expect anything.
the fifth date, we decided to cook together at his place (this is the second time I been to his place) and he said “we can stock up your favourite stuff in my kitchen so that when u come over u can eat your favourite food”, “if you want u can come over for a swim” and I was given his spare access card to his apartment. He then suggested that I should stay over for the night and cuddle with him on his bed (yes he said that and added ‘with clothes on’). At that moment I feel that this is moving too fast cause it has not been 1 month yet. So I hinted that I am tired and I want to go home. He got angry and said “don’t ask me not to smoke cause u are not my wife.” And started puffing away. I was so shocked and just wanted to leave. He then said u know I am not like other guys who can’t be your friends after you reject them, let’s be friends and we cheers to friendship.
1 week later I got a text from him saying that I am mean. I was puzzled n we met up. He starting cheering to friendship like 3 times an hour, suggested to introduce a guy to me, said that I should find some other online guys and said that I should not be depressed because I am lonely and at that moment I left.
I was very angry. My friends said that he is just doing it in my head and just be glad that I didn’t stay over night. We have not contacted each other for 1 month, and I suggested to meet up to give back the access card. But, we got back together because he said that he wanted me as his girlfriend.
Here comes the problem. When I am with him, I just feel that he has changed, he is hiding something he would ignore phone calls, cancel plans. And I usually text and call him. Even though I have his access card I don’t seem to be using it. And I return it to him as he was locked out once and I feel that he needed the spare card more than I do. And soon I realise he is not into things like he said before. Is like a change of personality. Is like this is the real him.
A couple of days ago I was drinking with my friends and we were tipsy and I told them about his personality change. We googled his name cause he bragged that he could be google as he was some fellow in the corporate world. I got nothing but his submission of his resume to be a teacher. And I found that he lied about his age. My friends words “fakes are what u get from online dating” is like a slap on the face like I should have known better. Feeling angry, I text him calling him a liar and said that I did not want to meet him before his trip. He called and went like “What’s wrong?” I said nothing is wrong and told him that I will meet him when he is back.
I just feel that I don’t know this person at all even though I have met his friends. So I guess is over. What do you all think?
Thanks.

Why do you need to "guess"??? Why don't YOU just end it with this jerk?
I don't understand why you didn't just walk away when you found out he'd lied on his profile about smoking--that told you everything you needed to know about him, right then and there.
Sheri
Welcome to the board opps_kk,
There are so many red flags about this relationship. I can't believe you still talked to him after him getting upset that you didn't want to stay at his place.