I love him but he lies!

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-26-2004
I love him but he lies!
2
Wed, 10-13-2004 - 3:13pm
I'm in a relationship with a younger man. He's not divorced yet, has three kids and treats me like a queen. The only problem I have is that he lies about calling his soon-to-be ex. He says he doesn't care anything about her anymore (their relationship broke up due to her infidelity). He is now living with me and is home every night. But why does he have to keep calling her? He says it's because of the kids, which I'm sure that is true most of the time. She begged him to go back to her but he said no, he was happy where he was.

As far as I know, he doesn't lie about anything else.

Can anybody help me understand this?

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-13-2003
Wed, 10-13-2004 - 4:32pm
Well logically speaking one can never really know all the things a liar is lying about. I think you're making a mistake living with a married man. It doesn't matter why their marriage broke up or when the divorce will be final. He is totally rebounding with you. Look at this objectively. She cheated on him but wanted to remain together. He is now living with you....in retaliation? To say, hey, I can be with someone else too? Of course he'd never admit that so don't bother asking him. A person simply cannot have a healthy relationship with one person when they have their foot still in the previous one. Not possible. You are not going to be the exception to the rule. In any case, I find it amazing that you would enter into a relationship with a married man, then complain that he still in touch with his wife. Is that really a big surprise to you? Even if he did get divorced, his ex will probably always remain in his life due to them having children together. No matter what the status of their relationship, he is the kids' father and she is the mother. They will always remain in contact over that and be in each other's life because of that.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 10-13-2004 - 4:34pm
catwee...

Pianoguy has NO SYMPATHY for you at all.

The man is MARRIED...and it doesn't matter if he is seeing you (and a hundred other women) because he's still TAKEN! The "kids" could actually be within your age perimeter! Assuming there really ARE children at home...he's quite a role model, isn't he?

Are you THAT DESPERATE that you'd take in a man who still has 'past emotional baggage?'

Here's something to kick around...how many other women do you think he has lied to in the past? And if the 2 of you ever became REALLY SERIOUS...which I doubt...how long would it take before he'd make excuses not to "come home" to you?

Dump him and find someone who isn't spoken for!

Pianoguy