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I need help
| Sat, 06-09-2007 - 6:53pm |
So I'm 25 and I've been with the same guy for 3 yrs. and I love him but after 3 years I guess it gets kinda boring. We're not engaged, we don't live together, I feel like it's going nowhere..and of course I really don't think he appreciates me. To make things worse an old guy friend of mine just got in touch with me on my space and has been telling me how much he liked me in high school, I liked him as well and we never told each other. I'm still extremely attracted to him and I'm afraid if I ever see him on the street I'll jump his bones. I still get that feeling like I wanna be single again so I can see whoever I want because I'm so bored with my b/f who always goes out and leaves me at home. What can I do to be excited about my relationship like I was when we first met? I'm afraid I'm going to subconciously start pushing him away and then regret it when I'm all alone without him...I need help

>>What can I do to be excited about my relationship like I was when we first met?<<
Your relationship will never be like when you first met. That first 6 months or so is fuelled by adrenaline and lust and it does fade. In a good relationship, it's replaced by a deeper love and in a bad relationship it's replaced by apathy or discontent.
What you've got to do now is take a long hard look at your relationship. I find it extremely telling that you say "I love him but". That "but" tells me that you don't really love him like you should. Perhaps this "love" is habit and affection rather than love? Also, I notice you don't tell us the good qualities you see in him.
Perhaps your relationship has passed it's use by date?
However, if you think it is salvagable, you can't do it alone. You need to express your discontent to your boyfriend and discuss ways to make it more exciting again. Find a plan you can both be excited about.
Hi Amanda,
Relationships don't stay in the 'honeymoon' phase. You can give a boost....but the grass is not greener. What happens when the excitement of that relationship wears out?