I need help with communication
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I need help with communication
| Sun, 12-02-2007 - 9:02pm |
This is going to sound ridiculous, but I don't know how to ask my boyfriend to spend time with me. I want to be independent and never think it's reasonable to ask him to be with me if he doesn't want to. We’ve been going out for a year and a half, and things are going well and strong for the most part. However, I run into this problem every time when I’ve become too busy. We only see each other when it's convenient. I’m able to make the effort to make plans and spend quality time when I have time to. However, when I have mountains of work to do, I want to be able to focus on that, but what really comforts me is simply being next to him. It’s the last week of school and I'm under a lot of stress, so I haven't really seen him at all because he's always off to do something fun; even when he has no plans he makes plans to hang out with other people. I feel like asking him to spend some quiet time with me would make me a horrible girlfriend because I’d be keeping him away from having fun. I can only pray that he’s busy the next day so that he has to stay in for the night and we can be together. I'm starting to feel inadequate in both ways because even if I try to be independent, I'm not getting to spend more time with him, nor am I able to concentrate on my work. So I guess my question is, how can I express my concerns to him without sounding too demanding or needy. Thank you!

Welcome to the board mchlku,
Your bf isn't a mind reader so if this is really want you want than you need to talk to him about it. It wouldn't make you needy at all. Just tell him that you are stressed out right now and it would really make you feel a lot better if you got to spend more time with him.
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Welcome to the board mchlku,
On the nights that he stays in, you can be appreciative of the quiet time spent together.