I need him to leave.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-12-2011
I need him to leave.
21
Wed, 10-12-2011 - 4:17pm

Hello,

I visit this board today deeply distraught about my situation. I have 2 daughters from a previous relationship. I am currently dating Walter and due to have his son. I am very stressed because Walter hasn't worked in an entire year. He has not worked because he is too lazy to put forth the effort to find a job. He LOVES to stay home, watch tv and relax. He also has a drinking problem, that he is working on. He has been sober for 3 weeks now.

I TOTALLY UNDERSTAND, that this situation is my fault for allowing myself to be involved

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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-22-2007
Wed, 10-12-2011 - 4:29pm

Proudmommy, I'm a little confused about what you're asking for.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-12-2011
Wed, 10-12-2011 - 4:43pm

I am confused. Apart of me wonders should I deal with it some more time and hope things improve.

However, every time I see him , I start feeling stress and i know that is very unhealthy.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-18-2009
Wed, 10-12-2011 - 4:57pm

A man doesn't need to be in the delivery room just because he's the biological father. If he is there, it should be because you trust him and rely on his support.

Sounds like you know exactly what kind of father he will be.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-12-2011
Wed, 10-12-2011 - 5:16pm

Its my house.

Avatar for mhash
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Wed, 10-12-2011 - 5:49pm

Time and time again women here share how they have hanged on in hope that their partner will change.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-18-2009
Wed, 10-12-2011 - 6:22pm

You don't have to be alone... Have you considered having your mom, sister, close friend there with you?

It makes me sad to think of so many women out there who are fooled by an idiot man who says "I'm trying"

Real effort has results. You're not seeing results, therefore, he is not trying. Men know that it is so easy to say "I'm trying" and a woman will stick around, because hope is what keeps us going. I'm glad you're worn out... In a way... Because it means you've reached the end of your rope and the only thing left to do now is ACT! This is your house, your son, your kids, your life.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-28-1999
Wed, 10-12-2011 - 7:19pm

Since he's on the phone all day w/ his mom, then he can go & live w/ her or one of his friends.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2009
Thu, 10-13-2011 - 12:25am

Of COURSE he makes you think he's trying!

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-16-2008
Thu, 10-13-2011 - 1:35am
Sounds more like you have 3 kids and one on the way. I think he needs to get off his arse and get a job and stop letting his pregnant GF work 60 hours a week to support him. This man has no pride whatsoever. I'm sorry but he must see how worn out and stressed you are carrying the whole load whilst pregnant. And it doesn't sound like he is going to be much of a father when the baby comes either seeings the whole baby thing seems to "gross him out" and he has no intention of supporting you in the delivery room. Really it sounds like he is just using you for a meal ticket and just another mouth to feed for you. Who is going to care for the baby with you working 60 hours a week?
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-16-2008
Thu, 10-13-2011 - 9:16am

Don't let the fear of being alone stop you from telling him to leave.

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