I need some help!!!!!
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| Fri, 09-17-2004 - 4:59pm |
So a month or so ago I just told him that there was actually someone there and that I was sorry for lying to him. But in the same breath we were not even heavily seeing each other, and like I told him if I would have known that he liked me that much I would not have went out with anyone else and I can't get him to understand that this was just an innocent date and I was out of my clothes because they smelled like cigarette smoke besides if no one was there what was I supposed to answer the door in at 2 a.m. not knowing who was on the other side. Besides he had been to a party himself and didn't even bother to call and ask me to go. Now he is saying that he can't trust me but he haven't even tried to give me a chance in a relationship to see what will happen. I really really like this guy but for some reason he is looking at what has happened to him in previous relationships and trying to put me in the category with all of the other bad things that has happened to him. All of this could have been eliminated if he would have just expressed his feelings toward me in the first place.
Now his thing is I can't trust anyone and every time I find someone that I like things like this happen to me. I have had times where I feel like I need to give up, it has been 5 years now since my husband and I split because I caught him cheating on me and our kids were with me when I caught him. I went into a very serious depression to the point I was on heavy medication and I wanted my life to end after I caught my husband because I had been with him since the 7th grade and I am 30 years old now. I tried to kill myself twice and I had to sit down and think that this wasn’t the Christian thing to do and I had children to think of. So I have been through some things because I thought that I was going to be able to be strong when I put my husband out and tried to move on and that didn’t work very well, you see what the result was. This situation now is very hard on me, I know I was wrong but that incident happened over a year or so ago and I don't see why he just can't let it go and we move on. I have had some dating disasters very bad disasters but I am not going to let those ruin me being with someone else. Please help me because I don't know how to deal with this or where to turn.
Because I have really been trying hard to make this work and put my trust back into him but I am just ramming my head into a brick wall with this.
Of course he thinks that I did sleep with the guy and I normally don't divulge to everyone that I have a terminal cancer illness and I don't make it a practice of sleeping around. It’s too much out there for me to risk my life doing that and I am already having a hard time dealing with the fact that I can’t seem to meet anyone that really like me for me. Because I am a very attractive young lady that don’t even look like I should be anyone’s mother and a lot of guys take that for granted and all they want to do is sleep with me instead of getting to know me. Sleeping around has never been right in my book but I would never get him to understand this. Should I leave him alone and start looking elsewhere?

He also shouldn't be popping by at 2 in the morning. He doesn't seem very respectful, since he stops over in the middle of the night without calling, expects that you'll be available for him, and then gets all bent because you may or may not have slept with someone else. He also has shown that he doesn't trust you. That doens't sound like a guy who claims to "like you so much".
Also, if you have a disease that is going to take your life, you should be surrounding yourself with loving and caring friends and family and not worrry about dating this guy who is not good for you.
My prayers are with you.