I'm devistated and don't know what to do
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I'm devistated and don't know what to do
| Sun, 10-07-2007 - 9:25am |
I have been with my boy friend for now almost 5 months, have known him for over a year and know almost all of his very shady past. Last night i just found out something disgusting that his best friend blurted out when we were driving home. They were disgussing a conversation about something that they did 4 years ago, and his friend said "yeah i hid it in the bathroom when you were having sex with that prostitute" "My mouth dropped and i said in a very angrily voice "WHAT!?" All my bofriend had to say for it was "Oh thxs Bernie, you just put me in the dog house, hahahahah man what the helll hahaah ooooooohhh this is great" in a alughing sarcastic voice, they both just laughed and his friend who blurted it out said "man she doesn't care, everyone has secrets, who cares" After i got home i was just so confused.... i cant beleive he actually had sex with a prostitue, paid n all. This was 4 years ago but its something i cant ever forget....whenever were together...its going to be in the back of my mind how he did this. I cant let this go, and with all of his past.....this is like the icing on the cake....im really having second

Perhaps the best choice here is for HIM to dump YOU.
Without making judgments about his character, or whether or not his past actions were "that bad" or something to be considered, simply because I don't know him and it's not my place... I have to say that YOU have to decide that you want to try to get over his past.
We can't decide for you. That would be too much for some people, and others find that it's not a big deal for them. If you can look inside your heart and see a time in the future when someday you're over it, then by all means stay together. If you truly don't think you can look past one incident then you should probably do the right thing and let him go before he gets too attached to you. But you will not find a man with a completely unblemished past who has experience with sex and relationships. It may be gross and unnerving to you, but it's something he did a long time before he met you.
Well you can't change his past, we all have one. If you can't let this go then you need to let him go.
You really need to work on your trust issues (you stated you have always had them) that is not his fault. He should not pay for your issues, or what someone did to you in the past. Judge him by his actions and not someone from your past.
Work on yourself and your trust issues before getting into a relationship with anyone.... if you don't you will not ever have a happy, healthy, honest relationship. If you don't have trust in a relationship then you don't have much of a relationship...... Good luck
Welcome to the board cutie_patutie54,
Ok, I'm going to come at this from a different angle - hopefully it will help some:
::I cant let this go, and with all of his past.....this is like the icing on the cake....im really having second