Indecision
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Indecision
| Wed, 08-15-2007 - 4:01pm |
I have been with my boyfriend for a year now. We have been through a ton of things in that year. He recently had cancer surgery, which was thankfully successful and there were no after effects other than a total shift in his personality. He can't decide if I am the person that he is supposed to be with. He says he misses and loves me, but that he thinks we have grown apart and are heading in different directions. He says he can't live with me and can't live without me. I love him and hope he snaps out of this and told him he is overthinking his feelings. I want to give him space, but not sure how much time to give him. I can't stand the indecision and don't understand how if we love each other, why we can't just be together.

Welcome to the board divinewaters2005,
I am sure being diagnosed with cancer has made him reevaluate his life and his look on life. And
glitter-graphics.com
It sounds like maybe he already knows he wants to break-up with you but is afraid to come out and say it. You need to find out if that's what's going on. If it is, there's no point in maintaining the relationship any longer.
Otherwise, it's okay for him not to be sure at this point. You've only been together for a year. That's really just the point where you start to pass the honeymoon phase and get to see what the relationship is going to be like after some of the romance has worn off. He's also just come out of surgery which is going to make him question. It's fine to give things another year or two and see where they go.
You need to talk to him and find out what's going on with him. If he thinks the reasons he can't live with you are problems that might improve, then you can stick out and try to work on them and see what happens. If he already knows there's something about the relationship that makes it wrong for him, then he needs to be honest with you about that. Good luck.