Is it Over?
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Is it Over?
| Mon, 05-19-2008 - 12:02am |
I have been with my fiancee for over year, engaged for 6 months. Over the past 5 months or so, he has, on almost a weekly basis told me it was over. I cry, he says he doesn't mean it, he apologizes. We make up, talk about counseling et.. We actually have our first counseling tomorrow. He can be really amazing. He will tell me the sweetest things, be incredibly sweet, be supportive. But these "episodes" are destroying me and my feelings for him. I still love him, and I obviously still care about what happens to him and to us. He tells me he's depressed and he doesn't mean it when he says that but he thinks he's trying to push me away. I've been steady for him, and I've always told him that I love him and I'm there for him regardless of what the outcome of our relationship is. But I'm starting to hurt more than I love, or the hurt feels stronger at least? I don't know how to begin to trust him again, and I honestly don't even know if he wants me to. Has anyone had a similar experience, or does anyone have any insight? Am I being stupid to believe there is a possibility this could work?

I dont know how you have endured constant declarations of "its over" and then him apologizing and starting again.
Welcome to the board ocean820,
Him constantly saying it is over has got to be a big stresser for you. It is no wonder that you are starting to have doubts about the relationship and its ability to keep going. If it is going to counseling is a must. It also sounds like he could benefit from some individual counseling for his depression as well.
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Welcome to the board ocean820,
So a month after the engagement started, he started telling you 'it's over' - he's either looking for a way out, doesn't want to get married, getting cold feet or doesn't know how to express himself well.