It's been talked to death...

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-19-2003
It's been talked to death...
5
Mon, 01-05-2004 - 12:21am
and is almost in every relationship discussion. But do we really know what it is? Can we eloquently describe it and what it is?

It's that elusive thing called "commitment".

I've yet to hear a definition of commitment that I can take to the bank.

Don't think this is a joke, I'm desperate here.

There's been every description offered, such as...commitment is marriage or a serious relationship. I'm sorry but those seem to be vehicles for commitment not what commitment is. So if anyone in their divine experience or wisdom would be so kind and help me with definining commitment, I would eternally appreciate it.

Or are there any websites that you know of that deal with this topic? or books you've read??

ahhh the sweet lingering of confusion abides until you remedy of my malady,

Linda

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-14-2003
Mon, 01-05-2004 - 2:27am
To me, commitment is prioritization. That is, if I commit to you, then I am prioritizing your needs & wants high, so I will take actions to take care of those things before I would those things with lower priority.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-19-2003
Tue, 01-06-2004 - 3:51pm
I like what you said about prioritizing. Thanks!

what else is commitment?

is it never giving up?

is there a point when it's okay to throw in the towel?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 01-06-2004 - 4:09pm
Commitment is not an entity, or a vehicle...it's a trait that some of us possess, and others do not in terms of "others".

We're ALL committed to our own well-being, security, success, and happiness - as we define, understand and accept it...whether we have the ability and desire to commit to that regarding other people - that's a personal issue.

Erin

quickblade14@hotmail.com

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-23-2003
Tue, 01-06-2004 - 4:37pm
Everyone has their own personal definitions...I'll throw mine in the mix too. Committment is investing enough faith in something to never desire to abandon it. :)
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-13-2003
Tue, 01-06-2004 - 5:10pm
Is there a point where it's okay to throw in the towel? In my opinion, yes - or it depends... When I made the commitment to love my husband, I didn't really know who he was (or myself, for that matter) - and though I did try to honor my commitment, I was really fighting a losing battle. In knowing him, I discovered how little really had in common in terms of values, priorities, goals.. He was depressive, dysfunctional.. It was a nightmare. Getting out, moving on, breaking that commitment of marriage, was the best thing I ever did for myself. So yeah, throwing in the towel worked for me.

Peace - Pebbles