jealous when i am already married??
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jealous when i am already married??
| Tue, 02-17-2004 - 7:55pm |
I'm hoping somebody here can help me out, i'm going through the craziest jealousy phase of my life. When i met my husband i met his jerk of a friend who we'll call M. M ended up not being a jerk and him and my husband stayed good friends. While i was pgnt M and my husband (call him C) would bring me lunch on their break and stuff--C has yet to ever do it by himself. M always asks how i was doing and hugs me when i see him etc. i felt so safe around him, unlike C. When we learned we were relocating M made sure to give me a big hug and said if C went on business trip to make sure and come visit him. C told me that he (M) always talked about me to the people at work--good stuff. So we moved away and when C went on a business trip i went home and M and I hooked up. I had expected to see M the next evening but it turns out he was at his gf's house (i knew he had one)...anyway i ended up prgnt (by M) but lost it. i havent stopped feeling stuff for M and i learned the other day he was engaged to this girl...it made me insanely jealous when i was told because i always felt he had a thing for me too, i am almost certain he did/does. i would file for divorce if i thought i had half a chance with M....should i tell him and see if it can happen or should i try to forget about him and try to fix the train wreck of a marriage i am in now??? It is so confusing, i have even had dreams that i am trying to get with him...??? I didnt realize the intensity of how i felt until the news got to me that he was gonna get married...I cant help but wonder if maybe he wanted more but since i was already married he didnt think it would happen. any advice???

How long have you been married? You were preg, so you have one child? And had an affair with M, but lost his baby?
This is so messed up. Neither of you have integrity, neither of you are loyal (you not to you husband, M not to his friend C) maybe you are perfect for each other, yet how could you ever trust each other? If M became your husband, he would probably start to wonder how long it would be before you cheated on him, as you have cheated on your husband? And I wonder how long it would be before you wondered when he would take up with one of your friends, or the wife of another of his friends.
What can you do? Either ruin everyone's life and tell M how you feel and deal with the consequences of your behavior OR work on your marriage (that means counseling) and distance yourself from M.
Carrie
The baby was my husbands, the blood test i had revealed to an almost certainty how far along i was..but the thought that i had turned into one of those girls on Maury who didnt know who the father was freaked me out enough to straighten up... C has a lot of issues he needs to deal with as well as I do, his temper is out of control for one thing. I know I have things to work on also. Its just a matter of how to forget about M for good and drop it..