Leaches Everywhere!

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-02-2003
Leaches Everywhere!
3
Thu, 10-07-2004 - 6:43pm
Do you ever feel like everyone around you is sucking the life out of you, or trying, anyway? I swear, all my friends are falling apart, my H is having issues, my Father-in law, my mom, my brother...and they call me, email me with their problems. I don't have enough energy for all of them, not to mention my own problems. I have no one to lean on, except the advice of facelss srangers on a web board. I don't want to lean on anyone, but I'm sure getting exhausted. I'm about ready to just block everyone's email, turn off my phone and disappear for awhile. ARGH. Sorry all, I needed to vent somewhere.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 10-07-2004 - 7:01pm
issueongoing...

Pianoguy thinks you need to shut off your computer, your telephone, and "veg out" for a few days.

It's nice to have so many people count on you...but you CAN'T provide a solution to everybody's problems...no matter how much you'd like to try.

Sometimes....a good movie, an interesting new book, a trip to the mall, a walk to the beach or through the woods are better alternatives...than listening to a lot of people complain and expect you to come up with an "instant solution!" I must admit that MUSIC definitely works for me....and I've gone full circle from Gershwin to Elton John over the past 72 hours.

Take a break for a few days, okay? Just tell the people who need advice that the "confession booth" is closed until further notice! :)

Pianoguy

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-26-2004
Fri, 10-08-2004 - 2:19am
Piano guy is right. I had a situation that was not quite as over loaded as yours and what I did is I told my friends; " I love you dearly and wish I had all the answers you need, but I can't decide what to have for lunch!" Then I said I would be away for a couple of days visiting someone and I unplugged the phone and just did'nt answer emails. After a couple of days they found someone else (maybe you) to unload on and stopped asking me for advice. Remember, even on an airplane they tell you to put the ogygen mask on yourself first so you can stay consious and THEN help someone else. If you let them break you down, you won't be any help to them anyway. Be their mentor every 3rd day maybe--that's sort of a compromise. Apparently they admire your listening skills and problem solving ability. Tell them you want a couple of days to think about their problem. That's another way to gain down time for yourself. Lets face it, you don't want to drive them away forever, just lighten the load so to speak.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-02-2003
Fri, 10-08-2004 - 11:39am
Thanks Pianoguy and Mokrie,

That's what I'm going to do...Dr. Issues is 'OUT'. ;0)