Left holding the baby!!!!???

Visitor (not verified)
anonymous user
Registered: 12-31-1969
Left holding the baby!!!!???
3
Tue, 06-08-2004 - 5:43pm
Need help! Got married 10 months ago and have a 4month old baby. Whirlwind rel, seemed gr8 to begin with, always together...etc. Now, i seem left holding the baby. Hubby rarely in before midnight. Feel so alone, why has my life changed so much and he still has the freedom to be out til whenever? Talked about it, screamed about it, still no change. So confused. Night after night I sit indoors whilst hes out there. To top it he doesnt work and all the pressure for the mortgage and bills is on me.Really need guidance on this one. What do I do?
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 06-08-2004 - 5:53pm
Hon, surely you didn't think that "aisle, altar, hymn"....or "baby needs a new pair of shoes" - was going to change the values that justify the actions - that are the same as they always were since the day you met.

Erin

quickblade14@hotmail.com

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-09-2004
Fri, 06-11-2004 - 5:34pm
That's a hard position to be in. Are you able to get support from family, friends?

Think of it this way. It's like this now, and it likely won't change. Sitting at home alone with a baby every evening isn't a life - unless one would really dig that I suppose. Sounds like you don't. First, boot him - one less expense. Then see what other kinds of supports are available in your community:

- see if your mortgage is reasonable for you on your own - you're doing it on your own now - maybe you can have it adjusted to make things a bit easier for yourself. Then you can call it all yours.

- are there people around you who are willing to spend time with your baby so you can have some time out with friends; so you can have real relationships or even time to go shopping without a child on your arm all the time.

Been there, done that. I'm on my own now, but not alone and lonely. Doesn't matter what the age - it can happen to anyone. Take care.
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-04-2003
Fri, 06-11-2004 - 6:10pm
Personally, I'd kick him out. I mean you are already paying for everything BY YOURSELF - rent, baby needs, food, etc. So tell him this: If he wants to act single, have at it, but not while married to you. He either makes an effort to be a husband and father or he leave now.


Carrie