a little perspective from the other side
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a little perspective from the other side
| Sat, 03-22-2008 - 9:11pm |
I have been married for over 20 years to a sweet, warm-hearted and quit women. A few months ago see told me she wants a divorce. My life

I hate to tell you this.
First, let me say how sorry I am that you are going through something so painful.
Thank you for your openness,
Yes, she is planning to fly and meet with one of the guys she is talking to. He is married and my W and he are trying to get his W to allow their relationship or be a part of it. The guy and his W are friends of our family. my W talks to both of them daily (on-line), when she talks to the guy she is very sexual, when she talks to the W she is more friend like. My W buys them both gifts and sends them stuff all the time.
My concern is that she is going to push herself out of this marriage and meet this guy and if that doesn't work she is going to try with one of the other guys she is talking to. I am worried that this is going to affect the kids, and I can't sit here and watch her do this.
Thank you also,
I also believe that she is addicted to sex or possible is just looking for anything to make her life exciting. Why won't she let me make her life exciting again?
As for the difficult time I went through, she says that she tried talking to me during it, but I was not willing to listen. I don't doubt that, I would come home from work and everyone would be on me about what was for dinner ( I'm the cook), I would take a shower, make dinner, watch TV for an hour (in the bedroom, alone) and go to sleep and start up the next day again. I was not happy, all she had to do was say that she was not happy and I would have done anything to change that, anything.
As for the therapy, she went to my therapist once and she came home and said the my therapist told her to push me out and end it immediately. When I asked my therapist about this she said that is not what she said to her and that she heard what she wanted to.
If this is an addiction or obsession, should I take the kids with me and away from any harmful situation she may get into?
Don't threaten to take the kids away, just do what is right for the kids.
Sit back and think about it, if you are the stable one right now...tell her nicely, that you think you are the more stable one for them and it will be confusing for them to see their mother with other people and not their father.
It would be better for them
Thank you for your insight,
I am thinking of having the kids live with me.