Is this love ?

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-07-2008
Is this love ?
8
Thu, 02-07-2008 - 10:12am

I have been more than friends with a pretty woman for a few years.

Now, people who know both of us say that we are very transparent and they can see how we feel for eachother.I know that i care for her a lot, get butterflies when i see her,want to kiss her ( havent as yet ), hate it when i see someone hitting on her,want to see/talk to her 24/7. But most of all i cant bear to see her hurt, not that she is.

Am i in love with her or i just care for her? I mean, are caring and loving same? I am so confused that am not even sure i have put my question straight but anyone who gets it, please respond.

Thanks in advance!

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-04-2007
Thu, 02-07-2008 - 11:15am
Only you know if you are in love with her. When you find the right one you will just know. Caring for someone and being in love with them are not the same thing . While being in love with someone certainly involves caring for them it goes much deeper than that.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-03-2007
Thu, 02-07-2008 - 1:36pm

You could be in love.

when strikes unexpectedly, some people do get confused.Just relax and go with the flow.I recently read on some board here that its important to like ( fond of) someone before you love them.i find it very true.

Avatar for drshoshanna
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 02-07-2008 - 1:54pm

My goodness, you've been with her a few years, have all these feelings and have not kissed her yet??? Why not? What's the problem? Is this all a fantasy going on?

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
Thu, 02-07-2008 - 2:09pm

Welcome to the board guyconfused,


When falling in love, sometimes we (meaning you) are the last to know. I

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-07-2008
Thu, 02-07-2008 - 2:33pm

Thats what our mutual friends are saying ! they say you both are in love, accept it.I was just wondering how could they know without me knowing? But seems that it is possible.I do need to make a plan!

i have been wanting to kiss her for long but have been so confused about my feelings.

but, thanks !

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
Thu, 02-07-2008 - 2:55pm

::I was just wondering how could they know without me knowing?


Oh, they can know.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-07-2008
Thu, 02-07-2008 - 4:54pm

butterflies can mean love and it could also mean nervousness or even just physical attraction...
for me this is what love is like.

When you love everything about the person..when you can even love and appreciate the faults that make them human..like a dorky laugh, or a strange sense of humor, when you can love them bald,hairy,fat,thin even with morning breath...when you are willing to think of them instead of yourself at times. when you want to be with them not just cause their beatiful or handsome...not just because of that electric tingle you get when their around...but because you love everything about them...you enjoy their company,you enjoy talking to them, and you dont want to be away from them, you find yourself wanting to spend more and more time with them....that you dont care if theres sex involved or not.( thou it would be nice..right?)..you just want to be close to them. and true love, unselfish love is loving them...even if they dont love you back even if that means you have to let them go if their in love with some one else...truly loving someone is thinking of their happinness,pleasure and welfare before your thinking of your own. if it is true love then i would ignore what other people are saying and i would approach her slowly spend more time with her and see if she likes you back, i would take it slow if she's been hurt.you dont want to be some ones rebound love. because all the great relationships that stay the course are the ones that are built on friendship and love not just physical attraction..cause when the flame of sexiness blows out friendship and love is what keeps you still together and gives you the initiative to rekindle the flames even when they have burned out...but i'm probably a bad person to ask...i've had many relationships and loved with all my heart but always had it broken because they never returned my love or where shopping for a better deal.i'm the one who is faithful and loyal and passiionate and loving but gets used and discarded, not the one who gets swept off her feet and cherished. but its better to have loved once then never at all.good luck ...ignore those other people..they just want to discourage you so they can have a shot, their probably just jealous.love is exciting i hope you find it with her.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-07-2008
Fri, 02-08-2008 - 12:00am

Wow ! I do feel almost everything you said!

Sorry to know about you but there will be someone, i am sure.

thanks and best wishes!