married 10 mo. and no trust please help
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married 10 mo. and no trust please help
| Wed, 10-13-2004 - 2:24pm |
I have been married for 10 months. My husband joined a forum where he talks about sports and stuff with people. I asked him if he talked to girls and if he looks at dirty pictues. He said no he would never do that to me but I always had a feeling he wasnt being honest with me. So one night I signed on to his forum and found out he was looking at nude photos of girls the whole time after he promised me he wouldnt do that. And to make matters worse he added relpies to them saying he wanted to have sex with these women.. I have confronted him about it and at first he denied it until I showed him the proof, then he told me he was just trying to be one of the guys.. I just have no trust in him now, after he lied to me for 7 months of our marriage. How can I trust him again? Please Help

First...Pianoguy won't make any excuses for your husband's bad behavior. It's basically stupid and immature....but unfortunately, typical of a lot of men who enjoy "porn surfing" or "internet flirting!" .
What has me curious (and slightly confused) is why the man is resorting to this ploy after only 10 months of marriage? Has anything changed in your relationship since the two of you said "I DO?" Most 'newlywedded males' are still thrilled being in the company of their loving spouses and don't spend their free time seeking out an alternative partner....UNLESS....the new bride has turned into the (drum roll please)...."Monster Mate!!!"
Does this sound at all like you?
Pianoguy
I'm sorry, I know the pain you are in. Good luck.
Pianoguy isn't sure if a "potential heir" is the issue. Granted...your husband would have to "share you" with a younger version of the 2 of you...but perhaps the thought of you getting slightly larger in the tummy might be making him a little nervous? Some husbands LOVE it when their wives are pregnant...and actually find 'em sexier! However, there are STILL a few husbands out there who don't know how to deal with an "almost mom!" Would you believe there are at least one or two who wish a child could arrive as quickly as a 'self-developing photo'----some men would like the process over in 60 seconds---particularly during month #9! (Now that I think of it...I'll bet there are at least one or two women who wish the entire 9-month birthing cycle could be 'streamlined' within a minute or two?). Anyway...
Even though you appear to be comfortable with the fact that your husband is 'surfing the porn sites', do you think he might be 'a little too embarrassed' to admit it?
How do you tell the difference between a "peaker" and a "pervert?"
Pianoguy