Men and Drinking

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-19-2003
Men and Drinking
2
Thu, 06-17-2004 - 11:04am
Just got over a 2 year DUI with BF. Before I met him he was a heavy drinker but pretty much calmed down since the so called GLITCH! of him getting busted. This whole incident pretty much turned me away from drinking.

My problem - the new neighbors just moved in and mr N is a big drinker, pretty much every night. BF thinks its ok to hang over there in his garage and have a couple. To me, have a couple is one or two and stop. To BF, its have a couple so that your feeling pretty good and then im suppose to be ok with this when hes 1 to 2 sheet to the wind. Were talking in the middle of the afternoon on the weekends or right after work. Im not ok with this. I dont want to hang with someone whos what i call drunk. He goes over when im not home. I come home the other day and instead of making an sceen, i walked away and did something else. He got all upset because i wouldnt come inside and sit with him. I told him he had the right to do what he wanted, but I dont have to be around him when hes like that.

Was I right to just do something else and walk away. Would you or do you put up with your man drinking. I dont consider him an alcholic even tho he use to be one. But i told him social drinking is just one and walk away. I know theres guys out there that do it all the time and Mr. N next door is like well, he can do what he wants to do. I dont want to make him feel less of a man, but i dont want to be with someone who feels its ok to be drinking pretty good in the afternoon either.

I have teenagers and he has a 5 year old daughter
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-22-2003
Thu, 06-17-2004 - 1:28pm
the first thing i'll say is that once you're an alcoholic, you're always an alcoholic. it never goes away. he shouldn't be drinking at all. as a daughter of an alcoholic who has been in and out of rehab for years, i can say that the only way he won't get worse is if he stops completely. he is addicted. he will always be addicted. you need to protect yourself so you don't end up bearing the emotional, financial, and mental brunt of his actions.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-02-2003
Thu, 06-17-2004 - 2:54pm

if you <<dont want to be with someone who feels its ok to be drinking pretty good in the afternoon either>> then why are you with him?


i agree with the other poster - he obviously has a drinking problem, and your idea of "social drinking" does not apply to addicts. he can't just drink one or two drinks. its all or nothing (preferably nothing!)


if you don't want to live with a guy like this - then don't. i know its not easy - but that's the truth.