messed up?

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-27-2004
messed up?
6
Tue, 06-29-2004 - 3:34pm
I think I messed up and need advice on how to fix it. I am starting to date again.

I went on a date with this guy over the weekend and at the end of our date, he gave me a hug in the car. Sort of surprised me. At least that's what I think he tried to do. I'm not sure if he wanted a kiss also. I hugged him back and I got really nervous. I did not look at him after the hug. I looked away from him and told him to call me while i was getting out of the car. I heard him say O.K. He probably thinks that I blew him off and am now afraid that he won't call me again. He's a little shy. This was our fourth date and we've gone out once a week since i've met him. I tried to fix it by emailing him to thank him for a nice time and looked forward to seeing him again. I'm starting to really like this guy. Did I mess up? Do you think he will call? Anyway I can fix this? Thanks in advance.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-03-2004
In reply to: jens128
Tue, 06-29-2004 - 3:47pm
from a guy's point a view I don't think you messed up, if he likes you too he'll hang in there and see what happens. and if you emailed hm and told him your looking forward to seeing him again I think he'll probly get the idea that you didn't blow him off and that you probly do like him.

Why don't you call him and ask him out ? that will beyond any shadow of a doubt let him know your interested, unless he's a little slow like on and doesn't pick on little things :-)

Good luck and keep us posted

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-09-2004
In reply to: jens128
Tue, 06-29-2004 - 9:49pm
You haven't messed up at all. You are doing some good things already in your relationship. He's not pushing you and you're taking it slow. Way to go!
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2003
In reply to: jens128
Tue, 06-29-2004 - 10:00pm
You didn't mess up but no one can tell you if he will or won't call. Give him a couple of days and then call him. If you see him again *communicate* with him-tell him that you are a little nervous about dating again but you like him. He will appreciate your openness and probably want to reassure you.

Let us know what happens

Gina

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-27-2004
In reply to: jens128
Wed, 06-30-2004 - 7:30pm
Thank you for all your responses. I sent him the e-mail on Monday and I haven't heard from him yet. I was thinking of calling him tomorrow and asking him out. Would that be inappropriate or pushing things?
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-27-2004
In reply to: jens128
Fri, 07-16-2004 - 2:26pm
Thank you again for all your responses and your encouragement. I've seen him four more times since my last post. I has been good until our very last date.

After my last post, I have initiated a hug the first couple of times when our date ended and he seemed fine and happy with that. The third time we went out, after my last post, we hugged and he kissed me on the cheeks and I was suprised by that and reacted a little nervous. But the very last time we went out, I was the one who intiated what I thought was going to be a hug and he suprised me by trying to kiss me (I think he thought I was going to kiss him). We both ended kissing each other on the face and 'the kiss' never happened. We both made our move but I only let it happen half way and I pulled back when I got really nervous and realized 'the kiss' was not going to happen. I wanted to kiss him. I'm so embarassed about what happened. It was such a sloppy attempt on both sides. It's been a long time since I kissed anyone. He did not look happy that night when I left the car.

I called him the next night and got his voicemail instead. I left a message letting him know I wanted see him again and to give me a call if he wanted but I haven't heard from him yet.

I think I really messed up this time. I don't know if he'll ever call. Do you think I should talk about it with him or should I just go with the flow and not bring it up....maybe we can laugh at it later on if I see him again?

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2003
In reply to: jens128
Fri, 07-16-2004 - 5:40pm
Communicate with him about your nervousness. Do it in the moment so you are not sitting around afterwards kicking yourself and analyzing everything he did or didnt do.