my friends x is coming on to me?

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-21-2004
my friends x is coming on to me?
5
Sat, 06-05-2004 - 2:49pm
I know this guy at the gym. He dumped his girl bout 3 month ago. Just recently she started coming on to me. There has been many time where me, her and her x were in the gym at the same time. She keeps flirting with me right in front of him etc.. he doesnt do any thing. he says what up to me, and nothing to her. i noticed he ignores her. all he says to me is whats up. i dont understand how they can both see eachother at the same time in the gym. i have not said anything to her about their breakup.

i just want to know if she's up to no good. is she gonna use me?

just last weekend i took her for a ride on my harley. she met some of my other friends who are also friends of her x. they all know him and her were together. this is just sounding funny to me. she mentioned that she likes sportbikes more than harleys. her x boyfriend has a sportbike

now her x has his life together. he has a good job with 3 cars and a sportbike. he has his own place, and many women want him. He has the players qualities. he's one of those tall, dark handsome guys and well built and is going to compete for the mens fitness/health covermodel guy. Im not that good looking of a guy and i still live with my parents. he's 28, she's 26 and im 26

they were together for a year, and they looked good together. he treated her well till he dumped her. Just wondering why she would actually settle for a guy who's not up to par with her x?

is she tryin to use me?

is she serious bout me?






Edited 6/5/2004 2:53 pm ET ET by alpha_male

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2003
Sat, 06-05-2004 - 4:06pm
'he treated her well till he dumped her.'

How do you know this?

Does he have problems with you dating her? If not, what is the problem? Are you often nervous about girls who are interested in you and paranoid about what they are up to?

Who knows why they broke up. Maybe is is not about how good they looked together or what kind of car he drove but about their conflicting personalities, or the fact that they had little in common or who knows.

Besides, if he dumped her why does she have to be up to no good?

Why not just date her and find out for yourself. Go slowly and communicate to her. Ask her what she sees in you.


Edited 6/5/2004 4:07 pm ET ET by ciao_gina

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-21-2004
Sat, 06-05-2004 - 4:10pm
Well she told me that he treated her good, then he dumped her because he caught her with another guy (wasnt me). She said it was a friend, and she didnt explain it to him. She gave him no answer, so he assumed and dumped her. Thats what she told me!

He hasnt said anything about me and her talking. He just says whats up to me,and continues to work out. I feel he might beat me down, but he shows no pain from what i see.

Its just funny to see her pick a guy who's a friend of her x, and flirt and hangout with all of a sudden. Right in front of the x. Makes me uncomfortable

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2003
Sat, 06-05-2004 - 5:03pm
'Well she told me that he treated her good, then he dumped her because he caught her with another guy'

Ahhhh...info that might have been helpful in your first port. ;)

Well if she outright flirts with you to make him jealous and has cheated on her boyfriend then she might be bad news.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-18-2003
Sat, 06-05-2004 - 7:16pm
to me this just reeks of her trying to hurt him back. (Paybacks for leaving her for cheating)

I agree and think this girl has herself as her only thought at the moment from how it seems. If nothing else, I would give them both a while to heal and I would definitely talk to HIM about this and clear the air on both parts.

People who cheat are often known to use the "I didnt but Im so misunderstood" thing. Its so innocent, etc, yet this man had been with her for quite a while and thought she had. Considering her actions now, I wouldnt be too open and giving with her for a very long time. If you take more of a calm cool attitude with her, you might just see what her true intentions are.

I would find out from the ex if he does have ANY contact with her out of the gym. (Wonder if she's mad at him and trying to get him back). What her excuses were, etc... as much as can be given. Let him know you arent very comfortable with the situation as it seems because you think you might tick him off, you dont even know if she is genuine.

Since she is readily supplying info, and it sounds a bit off, I think I would go to the guy. She has her side, he has his side and its likely that neither side is the truth, but its somewhere in the middle. Plus, if they would get over it and get back together, then you'd REALLY be talking uncomfortable.

Dont trust your heart to her until you can see she really is worth it by her actions. This guy got hurt by her whether he showed it or not, you dont want to be the next one to fall for it. Take care

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-21-2004
Sun, 06-06-2004 - 8:08pm
bump