My hubbie doesn't want to have a sex

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-06-2007
My hubbie doesn't want to have a sex
17
Fri, 12-21-2007 - 11:56am

Hi.


I dated my hubbie for a year before we got married which was a year ago.(so I have been with him for 2 years total) He was so enthusiastic at first, and he would want to have a sex when we hang out at my/his apt. Then after we got married and started to live together, his desire seemed to be decreased.


We would have a sex once a week for past half year, then once in 2 weeks, and now, we don't have a sex unless I ask him to have one. Even I ask him,

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-30-2005
Fri, 12-21-2007 - 12:54pm

Welcome to the board supergreen,


Since his sex drive has changed, can you think of anything that happened around the time of the change occurred that could account for this?


You might want to ask him to see his doctor to get a physical to rule out anything medical that could be causing this. And I'm sorry, but him saying you want sex because you are bored and don't have anything creative do is nuts. There is lots of creative, busy people that have healthy sex lifes.


If you aren't able to talk about this or fix it, it is going only to cause more problems in your marriage. Would he be willing to go to marriage counseling with you?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-06-2007
Fri, 12-21-2007 - 1:11pm

No, he would not like to go to a counseling.(I have asked him

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-30-2005
Fri, 12-21-2007 - 1:43pm
You do NOT need to look for some medication to lower your sex drive. There is nothing wrong with your sex drive and there is no reason you should take any medication that you don't need to take. This needs to be worked out without resorting to that.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-14-2006
Fri, 12-21-2007 - 7:33pm

You obviously have a sex drive much more than your husband.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-06-2007
Fri, 12-21-2007 - 8:15pm

Thank you for writing.


I understand what you said, and I agree with the fact that I have to be patient. However, the problem is that

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-31-2007
Fri, 12-28-2007 - 12:54pm

hi,


you might want to look at the message board called Mismatched Libidos.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-06-2007
Fri, 12-28-2007 - 11:30pm

Thank you fro writing.


I think he is selfish too. I don't mean that he should want what I want, no, but he can't live like a bachelor

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-07-2006
Sat, 12-29-2007 - 10:16am

Hi, I can feel your pain. I've been with my bf of 13 yrs. The last 12 have been the same for me. Yes 12 long years. I wanted sex he didn't. I felt like something was wrong w/ me. He told me I was oversexed, and sex is over rated. Now I know I'm not bad in bed so what the hell? Well I gained a lot of weight due to a med. condition. I asked him if it was the weight, he said no.. Well I lost all the weight and more. I'm down to 127 was 205. Now he wont let me alone. He always wants sex. I guess I should be happy, but I'm more repulsed by it. So I know it was the weight, and how shallow was he to punish me that way? I'm not happy at all and am thinking of leaving him... I'm telling you this b/c something is bothering him and he might not want to hurt your feelings. Yet not telling you is destroying who you are as a person w/ feelings. I hope he opens up before you give up like I did

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-29-2002
Sat, 12-29-2007 - 5:40pm

He should not have gotten married if he wanted to focus on himself and his career.


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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-06-2007
Mon, 12-31-2007 - 1:34pm

Thank you for writing.


I do agree with you about guys

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