My husband won't talk to me.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-04-2004
My husband won't talk to me.
1
Sat, 09-04-2004 - 4:30pm
Hi, I'm new to this forum and I was hoping someone could give me some non-partial advice. I feel like I'm stuck in the middle of a triangle. One corner is my husband, the second is my son, and the third is our social worker. The problem is my son has RAD (reactive attachment disorder) and has plenty of issues of his own and normal disciplinary measures will not work. We (my son and I) are going to a specialist to get him through this thing. My husband has only gone once. He doesn't know how to handle Billy correctly. He has done some things recently which has gotten our social worker (our children are adopted) concerned and she has contacted CPS. My husband is feeling like a 'dog backed into a corner with everyone kicking' him. I haven't even told him yet that a CPS worker talked to Billy at school yesterday. He isn't talking to me and even ignoring the kids. He refuses to eat dinner with us and today said he was considering divorce. He has told me I'm responsible for most of his problems, but he won't tell me what they are. We have been married for 16 years and we have had our problems in the past, but he's never been this hateful to me. I don't know if he is scared of the CPS or if he just hates me. I'm pretty much useless today, I'm upset, sad and confused. Any advice or insight?

Stacey
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-04-2003
Sat, 09-04-2004 - 6:50pm
Unfortunately, you can't make him talk to you. You can be polite, nice, etc, and hope it fosters more communication to make him feel 'safe', etc. But with all the issues going on, I'm wondering if maybe if asking him to go to counseling with just you as a couple to deal with the issues and discuss his feeling on divorce might work. It doesn't sound like. If CPS is worried, it's hard to know what to say without more details.


Carrie