my two friends are dating each other!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-18-2003
my two friends are dating each other!!!
1
Fri, 01-23-2004 - 5:11pm
One of my best female friends (21 yrs) and best male friend (25 yrs) recently met and started dating. Of course I was jealous and annoyed, as the three of us had been single together so I didn't feel alone. Once they hooked up, I felt like odd one out/loser/third wheel, etc. So I was a bit of a cow here and there over the past couple months. Not always, but sometimes I was angry/jealous. Anyway, all of a sudden he has almost completely stopped calling/emailing me and I am furious. I asked him once what was going on/if he was mad at me, etc. He said no and that he's just busy. Well that is true, but he's no more busy than before. What do you guys think is going on here? Am I being pushed out? Does he hate me? Do I just ignore them both? Please help.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sat, 01-24-2004 - 2:56pm
It's interesting that you didn't mention that she is avoiding you, only that he is. You should hang out with each of them separately, or just her if he's too busy, until you get past feeling like the odd one out. Pay just as much attention to your friendship with her instead of focusing on him because that might be part of the problem. It sounds like your jealousy and discomfort around them, even if it wasn't all that frequent, made him uncomfortable and now he wants to create some distance until you can fully accept their relationship. Put yourself in their place. I'm sure he doesn't hate you, but you have made things difficult and it's time to back off a bit. Make some new friends, and when you reach the point where their dating each other doesn't bother you anymore, you can spend time with them as a threesome.