need advice bad!

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-30-2004
need advice bad!
1
Sun, 05-30-2004 - 12:45am
I was in arelationship with this guy for 5 years. I also had someone else the same amount of time. My other friend wasn't dating anybody at the time but in the year of 2003 he started messing with this girl.My friend was kind of waiting on me to get out of the relationship that I was in. I guess he got lonely and found hima friend. Me and my friend did alot of things together just like me and ny boyfriend we even called each other boyfriend and girlfriend and it didn't matter who he talked to he always wanted me. Well, me and my boyfriend broke up in march 2003 and i moved back to my grandmother house. my friend and his fling broke up in march when i moved back home also.Me and my friend startes dating in may 2003. The fling statd that she was having hi baby it turned it it was his baby and he was upset because she slepted around with other people and he didn;t know it could be his.Me and the fling have gotten into fights,she calls my house,ride by blowing the horn,shooting the finger and anything else that you can name of.I want to know should i continue in this relationship with him even though he has a baby by her and jnowing that I'm still going to have to deal with her much longer and looking at the fact that it happened when we wasn't dating also keep in mind how bad I wanted to have a relationship with my friend and to know that she's always going to be there because they have a baby together.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-31-2003
In reply to: wondon
Sun, 05-30-2004 - 1:46pm

Is the baby his? You don't know that, and he can require from the state paternity testing before he supports this baby.


I wouldn't worry about it until you know it is his anyway. And ask him what he plans to do about it. First you need to figure out what he plans, and if you can handle what his plans are for being in this baby's life.


If the baby is his, that baby is priority over you. And the mom, you'll just have to deal with her. If you want to be with him, you can be the bigger person and not react to her pestering. It is all a difficult situation, but now a days, we all have complicated situations with ex's, kids...it is up to you if you can deal with it or not.


However, if there is question that the baby may not be his, then just lay low until you know. And make sure you know what his plans are.

 

-amy-    "CL-fiesty"