need advise to save our relationship

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-30-2007
need advise to save our relationship
4
Wed, 09-17-2008 - 12:10am

I havent posted anything here in a long time.

Kari,

Happily married & mommy of 3 in 07!

Avatar for drshoshanna
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 09-17-2008 - 2:57pm

It's important to make your marriage and your "date nights" a priority. It's too easy to put this on the back burner, but it has negative consequences when you do so. In order to be able to give your children the best possible care, they need to have two happy parents, who have a solid marriage. So, even though it may cost a little extra, the cost is well worth it to get that babysitter and get out of the house together to make sure the quality of your relationship is kept up. Sex is also important. When a couple goes without sex for a long while, feelings of closeness and bonding dissipate. That leaves the door open for lots of other troubles as well. Make sure you don't overlook this. You can find sometime that works for both of you, if you really want to and try.


Best wishes,

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
Wed, 09-17-2008 - 3:54pm

Welcome back to the board momof3nnov,


In addition to Dr Shoshanna's advice about 'date night' being important, I just wanted to add: date night costs less than a divorce (not saying you are headed there)

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-04-2008
Wed, 09-17-2008 - 4:38pm

Z
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-30-2005
Fri, 09-19-2008 - 11:47am

You have been given some really good advice so far. I just wanted to second looking into getting some cheap daycare (maybe someone who does it from there home compared to a daycare center). It is important for you and your husband to be able to spend some good quality time together.


Also for date nights you could rent a movie to watch at movie when the kids are asleep or go for a walk together.


Best of luck to you. I hope you two are able to figure something out.