need feedback please read and respond!

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-13-2005
need feedback please read and respond!
14
Sun, 06-17-2007 - 2:21am

Is it okay in a serious committed monagamous relationship to go through your signifigant other cell phone??

If you think so why?

If not why??

Need feedback please thanks everyone!@

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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-29-2003
Tue, 06-19-2007 - 9:19am

If you're meaning without their knowledge, no it is not.

To not show trust is to also not get trust.

I have nothing to hide ever, but the thought of my privacy being invaded rubs me the wrong way. If I had a thought or concern about who my wife was calling, I'd ask to see her phone/records or whatever before just doing it.

It's OK to have concerns and they should be talked about, no need for subterfuge or deceit.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-13-2005
Tue, 06-19-2007 - 10:05am
I never said anything about sneaking the phone without my SO knowledge I just asked if you think it's okay or not. But I agree completely with there not being need for deceit in a relationship :)
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-05-2007
Tue, 06-19-2007 - 2:24pm

i dont know of any good privacy issues with respect to a phone while in a relationship. it is only an issue of privacy if there is something to hide. is he planning a surprise birthday party that he doesn't want you to know about? if you look in the phone to find out, that would be an invasion of privacy.

Avatar for blondie0506
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 06-19-2007 - 2:44pm

I think reading someone else's text messages is tantamount to reading their mail without permission.

I have nothing to hide, but my mail is private. I may choose to share it with my SO or I may choose not to. Same goes for him and his mail (e-mail or regular mail).

To the OP, my SO and I have no problem with looking at each others' phones, but generally speaking, I would NEVER look without his permission. And I would never read his texts or look to see who he's called. It's none of my business and it doesn't worry me in the least.

Now if I *thought* that he was hiding something, then that's another issue entirely. I wouldn't want to be with someone I couldn't trust, but I'd probably, in all honesty, look at the phone to get 'proof'.

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