Need you Help urgently, at a loss
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Need you Help urgently, at a loss
| Sun, 05-23-2004 - 5:29pm |
Hello, I need an advice on how to handle the following situation.
Yesterday my loving bf had a party at his house and the conversation
with his friends went like this:"Jackie (his friend), remember
last summer we went to a wedding party and you went away and left
me there with a bunch of strangers I didn't know?" to which Jackie
replied:"Do you want me to continue with this story ? What about your
involvment with the skunk ? I will sink you..." ??? OK I thought to myself,
I will quesiton him later. This did alarm me because we started dating
exclusively last May. I was supposed to stay at his house yesterday
but I did not feel comfortable with this idea and decided to go home. I said
good-bye to the remaining friends and as I was just about to leave he asked me
what was wrong, and I said whatever Jackie said did not make me feel comfortable.
Yesterday my loving bf had a party at his house and the conversation
with his friends went like this:"Jackie (his friend), remember
last summer we went to a wedding party and you went away and left
me there with a bunch of strangers I didn't know?" to which Jackie
replied:"Do you want me to continue with this story ? What about your
involvment with the skunk ? I will sink you..." ??? OK I thought to myself,
I will quesiton him later. This did alarm me because we started dating
exclusively last May. I was supposed to stay at his house yesterday
but I did not feel comfortable with this idea and decided to go home. I said
good-bye to the remaining friends and as I was just about to leave he asked me
what was wrong, and I said whatever Jackie said did not make me feel comfortable.
Well, he got very offended and acted like an injured party, actually,
this is a trend in our relationship, he does not like to be quesitoned or told that
he is in the wrong. So he yelled at me and I left.
Anyway, today it's 4:00 and I haven't heard a word from him. I would expect a
real man to phone with some sort of an explanation of what his firend's comment meant.
Am I wrong for questioning him ? One fo my friends said if
I completely trusted him this woud not be happening, but it's hard to ignore that comment.
I am trying to be as reasonable as I possibly can under the circumstances.
...and how do I handle this situation?
olga.
Signatures On
| Sun, 05-23-2004 - 7:05pm |
If all you did was tell him you were uncomfortable and did not indicate that you did not trust him and he yelled at you then you have a big problem. This is someone that is not interest in listening to you or addressing your concerns. You need to ask yourself if you are willing to take this. You shouldn't have to take this. Tell him how you feel, either verbally or in writing, and if he has the same reaction then I would seriously question the relationship.
| Sun, 05-23-2004 - 11:45pm |
A real skunk or is that a euphimism for something else??? Him getting angry for you questioning him is a diversionary tactic to try and distract you from what's really going on which is a major red flag. He is trying to make you feel out of line when you are just taking care of number one and setting a healthy boundary for yourself and your own feelings. You are not in the wrong for trying to protect your feelings and you were right for telling him how you felt instead of holding it in. He YELLED at you? You were the one that was upset! Unless you yelled first, that was totally uncalled for. How well do you know that Jackie? Is this someone that you could take aside and ask about that story? I am so sorry and I hope you get to the bottom of this.
