no progression in 8 months!

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-26-2007
no progression in 8 months!
2
Sat, 05-26-2007 - 3:49pm
ive been going out with my boyfriend for eight months now and we love each other. honestly, were no different, relationship wise, then when we were only going out for 3 months. I see and know other couples and they seem more closer than us. We hang out most weekends, but not usually during the week, we never talked about it, its just the way it works out. Although i see him everyday in school, we barely talk. The only time we talk on the phone is usually only when we make plans to hang out. I feel like this relationship is going nowhere, not getting better or worse..but it's kind of boring. How can I change this? Do I have to be the one to take the first step? It always seems that guys think girls are needy and pushy when it comes to this stuff, but the only reason we are is because guys never do anything about it. They make us look bad, when theyre the ones taking the easy road, and leaving it up to the girls.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-27-2004
Sun, 05-27-2007 - 11:39am
What kind of changes would make you feel that the relationship is progressing? What would he do, what would you do if things were the way you'd like them to be?
Avatar for drshoshanna
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sun, 05-27-2007 - 8:53pm

Don't generalize about all guys. Some guys behave this way, others do not. The guy you are with just seems to be coasting along, not wanting more than a casual relationship. Don't push it. Don't try to make it more than it is. Just face the reality of what's going on and ask yourself if this is what you want in your life. If it isn't, if you want to be with a person with whom you can grow and become closer than clearly this guy is not the one. Accept him for who he is and if he's not what you want, or if the relationship is not growing, then move on and find someone who is more interested in bonding with you.


Best wishes,