numb..found fiance on ALT.com
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numb..found fiance on ALT.com
| Sat, 12-27-2008 - 8:46pm |
I really need opinions from the expert and men. My fiance and I have dated 3 years and they have been great except for a few glitches I will mention. 9 months into our relationship I found out he had a secret Myspace with past girlfriends and I was unhappy about this. He only deleted it after I asked him if it would be alright if I had a MS full of men I had slept with. It's so juvenile..he's 40. anyway, I thought all that was in the distant past. 6 months ago we became engaged. In the last 3 months I've noted suspicious behavior again...minimizing pages when I come up, and deleting the browser history....but he always tells me he's hurt that I don't completely trust him, so I ignored it. Anyway, just before Christmas I guess he got distracted and on the browser history was a login to his profile on ALT.com. I can't believe it. He has always told me he's so not into that kind of stuff when I quiz him. Even when I just talk a bit racy to him, he says "since when did this conversation turn into porn?" We sometimes watch movies to spice things up so I am definitely not a prude. He admits he was a playboy before he met me, and when ever I ask him if he ever has a hard time with monogomy, he adamantly denies such. I can't believe what he said on the site...

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Its really unfortunate that a smart, successful, beautiful woman can almost be convinced that settling for a life with a dishonest, sneaky, disrespectful man is the best she can expect.
People treat us the way we allow them to. Regardless of a man's quirky issues, he should be capable of loving his partner if he wants the luxury of being loved. If you really love someone your selfish needs don't matter more than commitment and respect.
Accepting and making excuses for bad behavior is what is wrong with the world today. If everyone behaves well and expects those in their lives to behave well, we are all better off. Its quite sad to see people with so little self respect that they will accept being treated poorly AND make excuses for those mistreating them...
There are men out there who treat their wives like gold--except for the fact that they cheat on them regularly.
So, is it okay to
<< There are men out there who treat their wives like gold--except for the fact that they cheat on them regularly.
Yes, that can happen but I was thinking more of guys who just ALWAYS act like that to their wives...and yet have a secret life with either a mistress or a series of them.
I'm floating around on the boards b/c I'm struggling.
The one thing I see in your posts is the lack of confidence in yourself to stand up to this situation.
Who CARES?
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