outlook on life changed
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| Tue, 08-31-2004 - 1:14am |
Since my last post, my soon to be ex moved out and the kids and I are adjusting. I am just wondering if any of you have been through this and if what I'm feeling is normal?? Here is the catch though...the relationship that I am coming out of was emotionally abusive. I am going to counceling for this. I don't know though if how I feel is normal or if I may actually be jaded forever?
I used to believe in true love and a lasting relationship. I grew up all around it...but I certainly didn't have it and although I would not change what I have gone through and the two wonderful children that I have...I feel like I never, ever want to get remarried again. I used to look at people with this attitude and think to myself that it was so sad because they needed love so much and that all they had to do was reach out for it and it would be ok. (maybe I was too much of an idealist?) I used to feel sorry for people like that and now I am one of them!? I actually understand why people don't want to get married or people who want commitments and decide not to live together. Maybe I've been through too much and I'm scared because I don't exactly know where my place is going to be? I am a nice girl who can't go have meaningless male friends and play around, I just wouldn't be capable of that. I think it is a very rare female that can do that or the ones I hear about are really just a mess. I also don't see myself being completely alone for the rest of my life either...how is there an inbetween? I don't know if any of this makes sense but I would love feedback from anyone with experience.
I would love to hear if any of you feel this way sometimes and if how I feel is justified or if I have become jaded. Is it possible to overcome that and have faith in something real again??
Thanks,
katlc

You are feeling alone right now because the only man you thought you knew, that you loved, is gone. What you thought was perfect, ended up being anything but and you are left wondering "What the hell happened?". Thing is, you can either become a slave to your own past, not letting yourself have the future you deserve, or you can get out there and change things. Take one day at a time and start living life the way you should have a long time ago- you deserve this.
Things will get better and you have an awesome support group here.
Best wishes,