Party girl vs Low Key Guy
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| Wed, 10-22-2008 - 3:26pm |
I would describe myself as unconventional and open minded person. My friends are opinionated and very open minded as well.
I’ve been in a relationship with my boyfriend for 3 years now and he is my complete opposite; very traditional and conservative.
The problem is that lately I have been bored out of my mind. I usually have a good time wherever I go. I have learned to enjoy sports and comic books movies and other things that he is into simply because it’s in my nature to be interested in many different things and I want to spend time w him.
He on the other hand does not enjoy things that I like to do and my friends are a bit to “intense” for him. Every time I attempt to get him to go with me to go see a band or go out dancing or have dinner with my friends it’s like pulling teeth.
Doing these things on my own is such a tiring option that I just end up doing the same old boring thing every weekend. I have two jobs (only Friday and Saturday evenings and Sundays off) so I only see my bf on weekends so he gets very annoyed when I suggest that I’m going to dedicate time to my friends instead of him.
I sit in front of a computer for 12 hours straight daily and then everything he wants to do involves SITTING and eating!!!
I need some excitement in my life.
How do I tell him I’m not quite ready to resolve to a life of boredom and house sitting?



Welcome to the board cutesydancer,
After 3 years, I'm not sure if you sucked it up to be with him or if the two of you really were never compatible?
Read the book: Are You the One for Me? by Barbara DeAngelis
I'm STRONGLY adding my agreement with the CL's book suggestion. This should be on your mandatory reading list, put all other reading material on hold and read it!! :)
I'm going to say right now that I think you are incompatible. Opposites attract and people with complementary traits often find harmony in their differences. But completely opposite people rarely find harmony and contentment, they often end up leading separate lives and growing apart. Your relationship, compared to most others, would take considerably more effort to keep together. I have lived in a relationship like this for three years myself, it ended quite some time ago but after we broke up and I got over it, I realized that I was sticking out the commitment because I was in love and not because I thought we were a GOOD MATCH.
If you're not having a good time with him you should not continue to date him. When you start preferring time with your friends to your boyfriend, that is a huge sign that there just isn't enough of an interest left, regardless of how you feel for him.
I do hope you can pick up that book soon, I think it will be very enlightening for you. Read it with the question in mind: "should this relationship continue?" and - if you really are open-minded - you will have the answer before you finish it.
Best of luck to you.