problem

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-27-2008
problem
16
Sun, 04-27-2008 - 3:07pm


can't seem to get past this. years ago when i first dated my wife we had sex she was a virgin after a couple of months she said she wanted to wait till she got married because it was speical and she wanted to stop

We stoped we were fighting alot about it and thins

we broke up and she right away dated a guy and had sex with him because she felt guilty that it hurt his feelings that she had sex with her last bf

long story short we got back together a few years later were friends the whole time

We got egaged but she said she wanted to wait till we were married. I was hurt and mad but she told me she stopped having sex for the last 4 years and only had sex with the one guy after me. She dated 4 other guys when we were friends and didn't have sex with them it caused a few break ups

We got married and now have sex but it still hurts me I was not the last person to have sex with her before we got married and that she had sex with that one guy cause she felt bad that it hurt his feelings.


how do i get over it. We don't have alot sex now but because she has a few phscal issues that she is getting over. I knowI am being a child about not being the last guy she slept with before we got married I just feel sad that she consider that guys feeling when he complained at not mine thanks

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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-27-2004
In reply to: jdsjett
Mon, 04-28-2008 - 2:28pm

At the time she had sex with the other guy the two of you were broken up, so she didn't have any reason to take your feelings into consideration.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-27-2008
In reply to: jdsjett
Mon, 04-28-2008 - 6:54pm

I in noway except her to say she is sorry for having sex with him. She has said she was sorry and wanted to be forgivin for being mean back then but I always say that is life people have sex.


iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
In reply to: jdsjett
Mon, 04-28-2008 - 7:49pm
How do you want the next 3-6 months of your marriage to be?
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-27-2008
In reply to: jdsjett
Mon, 04-28-2008 - 8:36pm

I would like to be able to get over it


iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
In reply to: jdsjett
Mon, 04-28-2008 - 9:28pm

Consider this: write out how you feel, everything, the hurt, the anger, and write about what she could possible say that would make you feel better..... I mean an actual dialog.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-27-2008
In reply to: jdsjett
Mon, 04-28-2008 - 10:39pm

Thanks I will try that. I did that once after we first got married I write emails to myself and then get rid of them.


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