Problems.....

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-24-2004
Problems.....
2
Mon, 05-24-2004 - 5:31am
Hi, am in a new relationship for about 6 months now. The first few months were ok but now these past weeks were like a living hell. We have been fighting over little things like not eating the right food, not enough money to watch a moive as she lost a job recently. Her parents can be a pain, the control her too much not allowing her to go for holidays, not being able to stay over at my place, can't stay out late, coming to my house for dinner is not right, its shameful, I mean come on she already 23 and the sister of hers can be a really bitch, watching TV in the room while we are trying to sleep, have to fetch her to school when we are going to be late for work. Nowadays I feel like we are drawing apart, she thinks that she is being sandwick by me and her parents and feels very stressful. I told her that I will try to understand her position but can't she understand mine. I feel the way that she speaks to me these days are also very irrtating and I lose my temper easily at the same time. Been thinking of my ex recently, I know its unfair for me to compare the both of them. But I am only human. So what should I do? I am thinking of breaking up.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-24-2004
In reply to: jazz1978
Mon, 05-24-2004 - 12:41pm
Im in a similar situation to your girlfriend except my mum thinks my bf is no good for me and that’s why she is being extremely interfering and going out of her way to be a pain in the arse. I can only guess how your gf must be feeling, as I often feel stuck in the middle of my boyfriend and my mum. I love him to bits and I stick by him as best I can but then it’s wrong by my mum, and when I try to resolve things with my mum as best I can with him it results in me having to listen to him slagging her off. So its kind of a no win situation and can often be very frustrating, as you’re stuck in between two very special people. Its true you probably do feel like you have drifted apart, that happened to me and my bf, I found that where I was so frustrated with the whole situation and I felt so trapped, not knowing what to do to resolve it, I started to take it out on those closest to me, which happened to be him unfortunately.

You mentioned that she couldn’t understand your position- it was the other way around for me and my bf, he couldn’t see how I was caught in the middle of it all as my mum is very sly. He thought I was overreacting, and at one point he even thought I didn’t want to see him as my mum wouldn’t let me out, I cannot explain the frustration I felt. Until one day he caught her out on the phone and heard her making a comment, and ever since he has been aware of her ways, it’s still not sorted till this day, they really don’t like each other, but just by having him aware of the situation and how I was feeling lifted a gr8 weight of my shoulders. We are extremely open with each other now. If I was you I would sit down and try to talk to your gf, I don’t think she means to talk to you like that, I think perhaps she has stuff on her mind, and by knowing your there will help her a great deal. Not only this, but having her will also help you. Give it a go! It’s worth a try;) Good Luck!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-24-2004
In reply to: jazz1978
Thu, 05-27-2004 - 10:58am
Thank you very much. Hope things work out for you too.