Question

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-19-2006
Question
2
Tue, 03-20-2007 - 3:30pm
I have a male friend that confided in me that his wife of 25 years has not had any physical contact with him in years.(7 or so I think) Anyway, this means kissing, touching, sex....anything physical. I asked him if he had talked to her about it...the cause...to find out whats going on and what he could do to fix it. He said that he could never talk to her about it. (obviously they have zero communication) He has told me of a female friend she has. They travel together...go out together.they eat at each others house a few times a week...(they include him sometimes)...very questionable relationship.
I want to mention to him my suspision of her turning into a lesbian. He is VERY naive and would never come up with this on his own...but being a woman, I know that this is NOT a normal situation. Should I make mention of this when he is on one of his rants? Thanks!
Avatar for drshoshanna
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: tar001
Tue, 03-20-2007 - 4:40pm

Yes, it's fine to mention this. If he's ranting, he's in pain, full of anger and doesn't know what's going on. It would also be a good idea for you to encourage him to go to a therapist. He really needs help if he's staying in a marriage where there is no physical love or affection or even touching for so long. This is abusive and he's accepting it. He needs to find out why? If he could have found out on his own he would have by now. There are deeper issues here that you can't understand or help him with. Tell him to go get the real help he needs.


Best wishes,

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-30-2005
In reply to: tar001
Tue, 03-20-2007 - 5:03pm
I suppose you could tell him if you want to. I would be prepared for him to be upset with you for thinking/suggesting it though.