Relationship advice
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Relationship advice
| Wed, 10-10-2007 - 12:19am |
My boyfriend just informed me that he has nothing to say to me and has broken up with me. I tried to talk to one of his best friends, my nephew, but he said he wasn't too positive about us getting back together

Charita, I looked back for some history on your relationship and found this previous
Welcome back Charita,
Here's your previous posts for your review and for others to catch up on your story:
Entertainment For Man
Being Straight Forward
Love or Lust?
I have the same questions as iv_aisha, so I will check back tomorrow for your response.
I know you feel things are going okay, you love him, you don't want to let him go... This is all on your side. I know you can't understand why he's doing this but the unfortunate fact is, sometimes people are going to feel differently from you.
Your ex doesn't want someone as sensitive as you are. He doesn't feel like he can be honest around you and he doesn't like how you act when you argue with him and he doesn't want to fight with you anymore. Just because he acknowledges that you are strong in "some ways" and you don't think it's wrong to be sensitive, that doesn't make you right for him. If this guy has broken up with you and stopped talking to you, then you have to assume he's serious, and you should let him go with honor and dignity.
Someone who is not able to relate to you the way you need them to, and vice versa, is not someone you were meant to be with. You can find someone who appreciates your qualities as QUALITIES and doesn't dismiss them as something he doesn't like and can't put up with.
To be honest, I don't feel okay or have any honor or dignity. Every time I really want something, it seems like I can't get it. But I believe I can treat him right and he loves me. Shouldn't two people who love each other be together? What do relationships
"Shouldn't two people who love each other be together? What do relationships require?"
I hate to admit it but love is only the first step in having a relationship together. Compatibility, timing, and communication are, combined, far more important than love if you're looking for someone who is going to be in your life for a long time. Someone has to fit you.
You may completely disagree with him when he says he doesn't think you're ready for a relationship, but if he feels strongly enough to break up with you over it then maybe you should take a closer look at why he's saying it. Not so that you can get back together... Your relationship is over. You should look to the future and ask yourself how you can improve relationships that you are going to have.
"He always said he's not everyone else and yet when he treats me like that sometimes it's so bad that I yell and curse at him."
Clearly you two did not fight very well. When you yell and curse at someone, and when he treats you badly, your relationship weakens. Relationships can't take too much abuse before they break.
"Still Wade has said that our relationship wasn't worth it before more than once, and then a few weeks later we're making up. I don't want that cycle to continue as a means of us having to fight before patching things up."
It takes a lot of people some time to get their feelings in check before they're able to leave. Your relationship is broken. If you attempt to mend it, if you succeed in begging him back, you will go through this again and one day it will be permanent. Why is he such a great fit for you if he treats you like a child?
Please don't get your nephew involved in this, it will save you a lot of embarrassment later on... Trust me there are breakups in my life I'm really ashamed to have not accepted with my head held up, and instead I got other people into it (one breakup in particular.)
Cece, I totally agree that love alone is not enough to sustain a relationship.
Charita,
May I ask, how old are you?
First off I want to say how I