ruined friendship
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ruined friendship
| Thu, 08-26-2004 - 4:58pm |
I AM MARRIED AND A FEW MONTHS AGO I MET A GUY THROUGH WORK AND IMMEDIATELY WAS ATTRACTED TO HIM. HE ALSO COMMENTED THAT HE WAS ATTRACTED TO ME AT FIRST SIGHT AS WELL. TIME WENT ON AND HE FOUND OUT I WAS MARRIED( I TOLD HIM) AND STILL THE ATTRACTION WAS THERE. HE WOULD FLIRT AND EVEN MAKE SEXUAL COMMENTS TOWARDS ME BUT THEN ON THE OTHER HAND HE WOULD SAY THAT HE COULDN'T LET HIMSELF DO THAT BECAUSE I BELONGED TO SOMEONE ELSE.HE HAS OFTEN SAID THAT IF THE SITUATION WAS DIFFERENT HE WOULD WANT TO BE WITH ME. ONE DAY WHEN WE WERE ALONE WE HUGGED AND HE ASKED ME IF SOMETHING WAS WRONG " DIDN'T I WANT TO HUG HIM" . THE ONLY THING THAT CAME FROM THIS WAS A LITTLE KISSING ON THE NECK,WHICH I KNOW HE ENJOYED BECAUSE OF HIS "EXCITEMENT"(IF YOU KNOW WHAT I AM SAYING). HE WOULD NOT LET HIMSELF KISS ME ON THE LIPS, BUT HE ASKED ME PERFORM ORAL SEX AND I REFUSED.WE WERE BOTH IN TO IT AND ALL OF A SUDDEN HE BECAME COLD AS ICE AND STATED THAT HE TOUGHT IT WOULD BE BETTER IF I LEFT BECAUSE HE WAS JUST TESTING HIMSELF TO SEE IF HE COULD RESIST ME.AND AT THIS TIME WE HAD GROWN TO BE FRIENDS AND TALKED OFTEN. SINCE THEN WE HAVE BARELY SAID TEN WORDS TO EACH OTHER EVEN THOUGH I APOLIGIZED AND HE SAID EVERYTHING IS COOL. I DO NOT WANT TO LOOSE HIS FRIENDSHIP, WHAT CAN I DO?WHY WOULD HE LEAD ME ON TO LET ME DOWN? AND WHAT COULD BE THE REASON FOR HIS BEHAVIOR? COULD THERE BE MORE FEELINGS INVOLVED THAN WE THOUGHT?

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I wont even begin with all of the reasons why you shouldnt have came close to this man because of you being married but.......
He pulled away from you most likely because he reealized that what he was doing was wrong. He is quiet now because he doesnt know how to make things right. My advice to you would be to wait it out and see if he'll reciprocate your FRIENDSHIP. YOu already apologized.....
In the future I would discourage you from engaging in relations with people other than your own husband..unless you get a divorce first.
Why are you concerned with his feelings and not your husband's?
BY THE WAY ME AND MY HUSBAND ARE SEPARATED.
If I were you, I would try counseling because you mentioned that you were in an abusive marriage which has now ended and that as a result, you have low self-esteem – which this guy probably picked up on and figured you would be an easy sexual target. Therapy will help you not to fall into this situation again. Good luck.
i completely agree with jschaedler. This guy was completely using you. Write us back and explain what
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