Sad over Friend of 15 yrs....
Find a Conversation
Sad over Friend of 15 yrs....
| Mon, 03-15-2004 - 1:01pm |
I have a very close friend, I met her over 15 yrs ago, I babysat her son when he was 9 months old and a great friendship come of it. We are closer than sisters, we have seen each other through the darkest of time and in the best. She was the kind of friend I could call anytime day or night. We could talk about everything. We both had abusive pasts and childhoods. She was the kind of friend who pulled no punches, you would tell you if your screwing up or your wrong and this friendship worked both ways.
When I got divorced in 94 I moved 45 mins away so we don't see each other as often and you knows as the years go by the visits get fewer and fewer.
So three weeks ago we said March 13th we are going together, no matter what.
We were so looking forward to it because she is moving farther south of where is at now which means over an hour and half drive.
So all week we are making plans. We decided Sat was to be the day, we decided this on Thurs.
So I give her a call Sat saying my Husband and I were leaving in 15 mins and she says oh my gosh I forgot...I have to go into work, they called this morning and asked it I could and I said yes, I didn't remember you were coming until you called.
I was so pissed and so very hurt, I was so choked by tears I couldn't say anything, she said say something, I got very angry and said how could you forget and she said this and that and so on and said I promised we will get together, I said yeah and what about this time, you said nothing would stop us this time. I said your moving farther away and blah blah and I got real quiet again and she kept saying she was sorry.
I went out and bought a gift for her and now I am just going to send it to her in the mail.
I could not believe she forgot like that.
All week were had planned for 3 wks. She didn't even remember I was coming until I spoke to her 15 mins before we were to leave.
The last thing I said was, I will get over it and I better go so you can take your call from work.
She said I am so sorry, I said yeah and I will get over it.
I am so hurt and angry. I have very few very close friends and I would never do anything like that to anyone of them.
I told her well, I guess your friendship means more to me than mine did to you.
I am not sure at this point if I really want to make any attepmt or extra engery investing in this friendship at this point.
Any suggest and how can anythng be different after this?
When I got divorced in 94 I moved 45 mins away so we don't see each other as often and you knows as the years go by the visits get fewer and fewer.
So three weeks ago we said March 13th we are going together, no matter what.
We were so looking forward to it because she is moving farther south of where is at now which means over an hour and half drive.
So all week we are making plans. We decided Sat was to be the day, we decided this on Thurs.
So I give her a call Sat saying my Husband and I were leaving in 15 mins and she says oh my gosh I forgot...I have to go into work, they called this morning and asked it I could and I said yes, I didn't remember you were coming until you called.
I was so pissed and so very hurt, I was so choked by tears I couldn't say anything, she said say something, I got very angry and said how could you forget and she said this and that and so on and said I promised we will get together, I said yeah and what about this time, you said nothing would stop us this time. I said your moving farther away and blah blah and I got real quiet again and she kept saying she was sorry.
I went out and bought a gift for her and now I am just going to send it to her in the mail.
I could not believe she forgot like that.
All week were had planned for 3 wks. She didn't even remember I was coming until I spoke to her 15 mins before we were to leave.
The last thing I said was, I will get over it and I better go so you can take your call from work.
She said I am so sorry, I said yeah and I will get over it.
I am so hurt and angry. I have very few very close friends and I would never do anything like that to anyone of them.
I told her well, I guess your friendship means more to me than mine did to you.
I am not sure at this point if I really want to make any attepmt or extra engery investing in this friendship at this point.
Any suggest and how can anythng be different after this?

I would not sacrifice my friendship or try to punish her though. I would probably talk to her and explain my disapointment and want more of an explanation if there was one. Is she going through a lot right now?
'I have very few very close friends'
Why is that?
I am copying some things you wrote in your profile:
'Favorite Quote: With every closed door, there is one waiting to be opened.'
It probably feels like she slammed the door on you so how can you turn this experience around?
'Best advice I ever received : This too shall pass'
What do you think of that?
My friend of 15 yrs, would never go after my BF's or Husband, she keeps my secrets that I tell her and visa versa.
I trust her, more than I trust my own sister or any BF for that matter.
I have women friends but not as close as this friend is.
good luck