sex on the first date -

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-30-2003
sex on the first date -
3
Sun, 03-28-2004 - 6:50am
I recently met a guy and I felt an instant connection and attraction towards him. From his responses, I thought that feeling was mutual. We exchanges phone numbers. I made the first move and called him. We chatted for a while and he asked me out. Of course I agreed and we had a great time. I felt some sort of familiarity with him.

After our date, I invited him in my place. We chatted for a while, about family, friends, work. I shared some of my family pictures with him.

Then, one thing led to another and we started kissing. Needless to say things got really hot and we were having sex. I hesitated in the beginning telling him that i thought it was too soon but I am so attracted and drawn to him physically that I let it happen. He told me afterwards that I remind him of someone that he used to know a long time ago. He said that my face reminded him of her like we were twins. He didn't want to say anything else but from the looks on his face, she must have been someone very special that broke his heart. I didn't push the subject as he didn't want to say more. I know by his actions that he was attracted to me but... maybe because I look like her. He left and told me that he will call me. I haven't heard from him in two days. I did contact him but he has not returned my phone call.

I really want to get to know him more because I felt something the first time I met him.

I am not the type of girl that jumps to bed with a guy on the first date. This was definately my first. I don't know what to do. Should I just let go or should I try to contact him again and explain how I feel. I hope I didn't scare him off.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-28-2003
Sun, 03-28-2004 - 8:34am
Oh ick. This doesn't sound good. I think your instincts are telling you something and you should follow them. Perhaps he started with good intentions but seems to me he did get caught up in the fact that you reminded him of someone and he let that emotion take control and you were caught up in it. Very sad. I believe, however, that you have learned a valuable lesson already. You realize it wasn't smart to have sex on the first date and now you know why and I really doubt you'll ever do that again. It just doesn't work out most of the time. I felt icky after sleeping with my SO *before* our first date. The very first time we met and that is not like me either. I worried afterward but I gut lucky....thank my lucky stars. If I could go back and do it over I would have waited to sleep with him even though things have been great. :)

Jennifer

"Oh, that you would bless me indeed, and enlarge my territory, that Your hand would be with me, and that You would keep me from evi

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sun, 03-28-2004 - 12:08pm
nasia...

Pianoguy is curious. Did this gentleman say you reminded him of an "EX" because he was sincere? Or was he just trying to make conversation before he left?

Your sexual urges might have surprised him!

Problem is...if he ever contacts you again...you'll be in the position where he might expect the same 'sexual responses' all over again.

Is that what YOU want?

Give any future date some serious thought, but whatever you do...don't contact him.

Pianoguy

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-30-2003
Sun, 03-28-2004 - 2:25pm
pianoguy

I don't think he was trying to make conversation because he had told me that I remind him of this "girl" before our first date and whatever followed.

He didn't say that she was an EX but the expression on his face said it all.

I don't know what I will do if he did contact me again, as I don't want a relationship that is only about sex.

I am definately not contacting him.

Thanks for your response.