sexually frustrated boyfriend

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-29-2003
sexually frustrated boyfriend
1
Tue, 03-16-2004 - 10:57am
my bf told me saturday that he`s sexually frustrated. last week i felt like he was distancing himself from me, when he use to blow my phone up, lately i`d be good to get 2 calls a week. he use to be so easy going, nothing could upset him, he was so laid back & he just even my hott-head out. then when i called him last week he answerd the phone yelling at his lil neice (she sounded SOOOO cute telling him to leave her alone). but anywho, on top of wanting sex, the back window on his suburban was broken, one of the tires was burst & he got those expensive rims on it, etc, this was done by guys that mistaked his vehichle for another person. so he was very upset about that. he`s been going through a lot of different things that have been stressing him out & he wants to release some of that energy & as a result of that, he has become sexually frustrated. i`m human so i definitely understand how he feels but because i`m letting cold showers, funny movies, calculating bills...things that keep me busy, keep my mind off of it. his stress is a lil more intense than mine. after all of that has been said & done, i still cannot compromise my celibate beliefs but how can i be more understanding about his feelings/needs? i don`t want to lose him but no matter what, i have to do what`s right for me. i even asked him why doesn`t he mstb & he said he never had to & doesn`t want to. i`m thinking to myself, it`s a first time for everything & it`s also a fairly good replacement for the real thing...but i didn`t tell him that. i know that he & i are close to spending some real one on one time together before i show him off to the family & church. but we need a clear understanding that no sex is going to be involved. two things that really have me upset, one...i had a dream about me having sex & for almost 3 years i`ve been having dreams & they have been happening days, weeks & months later. so i`m wondering how is this dream going to come into play. two...in the past when a guy got tired of waiting on me to give him some, he ended up dumping me & i`m at that age where i`m tired of starting over. but at the same time, i`m willing to do whatever it takes to make the right choice for devin. but i still want to know, what can i do to make things easier on him???

a non-sexually frustrated ivillage user...dee ;)

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-29-2003
Tue, 03-16-2004 - 11:38am
Sexually frustrated?! Poor baby! Your boyfriend is using one of the oldest ploys in history to get into your pants. If he were an mature man he would deal with his "frustration" and honor your values and not pressure you into something you don't believe in. Just offer him a sympathetic ear - nothing more.

By the way, don't let your dreams upset you. These are normal because our sexual appetites and urges are normal. You are dealing with these normal feelings in a responsible way. Be patient. One day you will meet a man who shares your values and who will be worthy of you.