She just won't go away!
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| Thu, 05-13-2004 - 2:48pm |
I've been with my man for 4+ years. We've lived together for almost 3 of those years and have a 2yr old child together. In the beginning of our relationship, he said that he had never really been in anything serious and his longest relationship had been a year off and on....and then "her" name came up.
The first incident was when I found her phone number. He dropped it at my place from his bag. When I asked who she was, first he played dumb then he said she was a girl from his class. When I pointed out that the number had an area code three hours away from us, she then became a girl he used to "mess with" but wasn't serious with.
Flash forward a couple months...I went away for a while to another state. I find out later when I get back that he met up with this chick (his ex) to talk while I was gone. He tried to deny it but then admitted it and said she meant nothing to him. He went on and on about how he told her he wasn't interested and they were only together back in the day because of sex. She wasn't important...or so he said.
Now, it's 4 YEARS LATER and I found out that he's still emailing her, talking to her, and he even had the nerve to try making plans to see her while I'll be out of town visiting my family later on this month! I am so pissed that every time I look at him I feel disgusted. When confronted about it, first (again) he tried to lie and then he told me I was overreacting and he wasn't really gonna go. I have had it with him, his lies, and this girl's name coming up in my relationship. She's like the b*tch that just will not die! Can someone please help me to process all this before I end up killing him? Any advice would be appreciated.

I'd suggest reading "When Your Lover is a Liar" by Susan Forward to help you in your decision process.
Sheri
WELCOME TO THE BOARD!!
I understand your frustration...but remember these few lines you wrote...
"I have had it with him, his lies, and this girl's name coming up in my relationship. She's like the b*tch that just will not die!"
-- Okay, so it isn't that she is the b*tch that just won't die. It is that he is ALLOWING it. So, remember that, and I think you can process it really fast.
-amy- "CL-fiesty"
How many more years need to pass of him going behind your back like this before you realize he isnt going to change? As many times as you have caught him, I wonder how many times you havent?
This man has deceited you and your child and will continue to do so because you do