Should I be mad at him...

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-04-2007
Should I be mad at him...
21
Sat, 10-20-2007 - 11:37am

My bf called me last night to tell me he was hanging out with some of his friends late. I didn't mind but I wanted to be there with him. He worked all day long so I figure he would be too tired to drive to come and pick me up so I didn't say anything to him.

Later on he called me after midnight that they would be playing some flash light tag and I ask him who all were there. I found out that his ex-gf who is not over him and who also hates me was there. (Me and my bf has been together for 2yrs and He and her has been long broken up before we met.) I know he is not going to do anything stupid. He can't stand her at all. I reminded him that he has to work the whole day tomorrow so he should go to bed in a decent time.

He called me this morning and told me that he just went to bed about an hr ago. He is on his way to work. I am mad at him because he knows I wants to be there too and told me too tired to drive 20 mins to come and pick me up But not too tired to stay up all night and play?

He also knows that I don't like it when his ex and him hang out together when I am not there even if its in a social setting.

He said he was sorry. I mean I feel that I should not be mad at him, but I am mad at him.

Anyone has any thoughts on this as an 3rd party. :(

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-04-2007
Sat, 10-20-2007 - 8:25pm
thank you. :)
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-13-2004
Sat, 10-20-2007 - 8:49pm

I think a lot of this problem could have been avoided if you were more self reliant.

Dress Up Games, Doll Makers and Cartoon Dolls @ The Doll Palace
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-04-2007
Sat, 10-20-2007 - 8:54pm
I do drive. I just don't feel like driving and I am not mad at him for not coming to pick me up. (well not completely) I am mad at him for saying 1 thing and doing another. He told me he was too tired to pick me up then go and play frisbee and flashlight tag all night long.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-13-2004
Sat, 10-20-2007 - 10:51pm

So why is it OK for you to not feel like driving, but it's not OK for him?

Dress Up Games, Doll Makers and Cartoon Dolls @ The Doll Palace
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-04-2007
Sat, 10-20-2007 - 10:59pm
mm. you do have good points. I feel what I feel. Thanks for giving me a different perceptive. :). I am just upset because he tell me 1 thing and do another.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-13-2004
Sun, 10-21-2007 - 5:53am

>>I feel what I feel<<


Absolutely!

Dress Up Games, Doll Makers and Cartoon Dolls @ The Doll Palace
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-17-2002
Sun, 10-21-2007 - 10:49am

I agree with aisha - you feel what you feel, but yes, your anger and upset about this are really unresonable.

131.gif image by y_baros th5K.gif image by jade_simo

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-04-2007
Sun, 10-21-2007 - 12:03pm
Thank you everyone for your good advices. :)
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-20-2007
Sun, 10-21-2007 - 7:30pm

"I do drive. I just don't feel like driving and I am not mad at him for not coming to pick me up."

Wow. At least you're honest. I think it's ridiculous to expect someone to do something for you just because you don't "feel" like doing it yourself. You know, two people who really love one another would do anything for the other person, but they don't ask things of one another unless they really need it. It's called "taking advantage of someone" and I think that a girlfriend who asks things of her boyfriend as simply a matter of her convenience will probably not last too long as a girlfriend.

If I were him I'd have acted the same way :(

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-04-2007
Mon, 10-22-2007 - 3:56am

oh goodness. I am not mad at him for not coming to pick me up. I am not sure I should be mad at him for telling me one thing and doing a different thing later on.

for some reason, i just feel like you like to attack me egg.

I treat him good and he treats me nice back. I do things for him and he do things for me. The reason I posted on here was I wanted a 3rd person point of view to see if my feelings were a bit over board. I am trying to think before I act upon it.

So thank you for your opinion, but how long I am going to be his girlfriend? NO ONE will know for sure. I hope I will be his wife. but I don't think anyone aside from us would know or should involved.