should i be upset???

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-19-2006
should i be upset???
5
Thu, 06-21-2007 - 4:45pm
ok so here is the problem, my fiance has 2 children in which i absolutely adore and love! and i absolutely love when they are around. Well we usually have them every other weekend, but since summer started we get them every other week. Well this is our week off without the kids and tonight we finally have some time by ourselves with nothing to do--monday-wednesday we had baseball games for them to attend.Well the youngest child asked if he could come spend the night over and my fiance said yes. And i got upset. Should i be upset or not?
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-05-2007
Thu, 06-21-2007 - 4:48pm

you should not be upset...the kids should be a priority. his answer should always be yes, unless you already have some pressing type plans that make it not possible.

your fiance has kids. the sooner you accept that reality, the better.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
Thu, 06-21-2007 - 5:00pm

Hi nikkit7,


If you are upset, you are upset. Those are your feelings. It's not a matter of 'should' you be. You are.


So, in order for this to not happen again, you need to talk to him about your expectations for the week that the kids are gone - like at least one date night, that includes no kids for adult play time.




iVillage Member
Registered: 06-08-2007
Thu, 06-21-2007 - 5:32pm
I would be so grateful for any amount of time with my BF's kid, he hardly gets any time, bad situation, going through the courts, we would both be thrilled to get a phone call saying we've got extra time or an extra day. What if you got married and for some reason he ended up with full custody?
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-19-2006
Thu, 06-21-2007 - 5:37pm
its not that i dont want them around i was just excited we finally had alone time
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-19-2002
Thu, 06-21-2007 - 7:17pm
You can be upset if you want to be. You had an expectation and you were disappointed. Have you talked to your fiance? Just let him know that you'd like to get some alone time on the weekends with him. He might even feel the same way you do...