Should I even dare going back to this?

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-20-2004
Should I even dare going back to this?
2
Sun, 03-21-2004 - 11:39pm
So, my boyfriend of about a little over a year broke up with me about a month ago. We had broken up before because we were fighting, got back together-worked on things and they were great. He was talking about future ect... So when he broke up with me this last time it was really a shock. His reasoning was that it wasn't what he needed in his life. A month passes and he wants to get back together with me now. Saying that he's been fighting himself this whole month and thought that this was what he wanted and now realizes that he doesn't want to live his life without me in it. I mean I couldn't believe my ears. It's like is this guy completely insane or have I lost my mind? How do you go from not wanting it in your life, not calling, no real explanation to- oh, I want you back now and we have to try and make things work out? This doesn't make any sense at all to me. Why would you break up in the first place or why come back? When we were together he said he loved me and broke up with me, should I even dare to trust this guy again? He also adds that he loves me so much and never wants to cause me any kind of pain again, and wants to do whatever it takes to make this work. I just don't see how you can make it work when you left it so easily to begin with. What so you could do it again? Please, if any of you have some words of wisdom for me they would be greatly appreciated!




Edited 3/22/2004 12:52 am ET ET by schiele314
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Mon, 03-22-2004 - 9:14am
aw, hon... i know you like this guy but he's really unreliable in how he behaves... one moment he wants you, next moment he cuts it off... back and forth.

he's gonna try so hard to win you back... he'll do wonderful, thoughtful things... and in the back of your mind you might wonder when the next zinger is going to come... when he's going to be inconsistent again.

and it might... and it might not. but the feelings you have when he's trying to win you back will be so good that you'll want to believe it.

it's when it happens again that it will hurt you more. when you are so angry at yourself for not following your gut and so hurt that he did it again.

sometimes these things happen and all is well once you get back together... but sometimes not.

just watch your heart.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-04-2003
Mon, 03-22-2004 - 11:56am
I agree with bawitdaba.

Have you read He's Scared. She's Scared. by Steven Carter and Julia Sokol? I think you might find that it describes your boyfriend's behavior.

My best to you.


Carrie