Sleepless in New Jersey
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|Tue, 12-25-2012 - 10:46pm|
It has been 2 long harrowing years that I've been trying to make things work with my husband. Two years of the same frustrating talks over and over. Two years of empty promises that he'll turn over a new leaf. It's Christmas Day and we went to bed arguing about the same thing we've been arguing about for the last 2 years.
Let me start off by saying that I know I'm not perfect. I know that I have my own faults, but my husband's overall gloom and lifeless personality is really tough to bear for me anymore. No, he wasn't like this when we met, but I noticed this change since we had a child. Ever since, he's never been the same. He always seems to be tired, depressed, unenergetic. Our son is 7 years old now and he sees his dad not doing anything. We both work and we share our responsibilities with our child (which I totally appreciate), but by the time we're home, all my husband wants to do is sit on the couch and check his blackberry or watch TV. He doesnt' like to exercise and doesn't watch what he eats. Yes, he's overweight now and not only is it so disheartening for me to see (of course, I want my man to look good), but more importantly, he's not setting a good example to our son. Oh, yes, it's dry in the sex department too. I have to plead for it. Then we get on the same cycle of talks over and over again. I've suggested he gets himself checked out by the doctor (for sleep apnea, depression among others) - he says he made an appointment but never goes. I've even suggested marriage counseling - he doesn't want to.
I'm so exhausted. 2 years of the same thing over and over. I feel like I'm talking to a wall every time. Honestly, I'm surprised that I haven't cheated on him yet especailly when there's a really hot guy at work, who I know is interested in me. But, I know it's not the right thing to do. ANd I know cheating won't fix anything even if I pretend to do it just to wake my husband up. But, it's not fair to me, and I only stick it out for our son and my morals.
Does anybody out there have any good suggestions? How do I get out of this rut?? What's going to motivate my husband to snap out of whatever this is that's taken over him?