Somebody new

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-19-2007
Somebody new
3
Sun, 08-19-2007 - 7:52pm
Hi,
I am a 43 yr young man that has been married for 21 yrs, recently I have met someone through the place where I work that makes me feel like a teen again. Nothing physical has happened between us yet but what I am confused about is that it doesn't feel wrong like it should. I have never cheated on my wife in all our married yrs so wwhy do I feel like this?
My current situation is that sex is a once monthly thing and my wife makes it sound like a chore, she never initiates it and she is always around which makes me feel smothered.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-26-2007
In reply to: haldace
Sun, 08-19-2007 - 11:35pm

I am a 43 yr young man that has been married for 21 yrs,


Congratulations! 21 years of marriage is quite an accomplishment!


recently I have met someone through the place where I work that makes me feel like a teen again.


OK. That's all good and nice that she makes you feel "like a teen again". Really what does feeling like a teen again mean ? FREE? NO "BALL & Chain?


Nothing physical has happened between us yet but what I am confused about is that it doesn't feel wrong like it should.


If nothing physical happened then it's not going to feel wrong.....YET.


I have never cheated on my wife in all our married yrs so why do I feel like this?


You have been married since you were 22 years old ... This makes me wonder if you ever got to actually "be a teen" . Did you get to have the experience of dating other women?


lips

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-20-2007
In reply to: haldace
Mon, 08-20-2007 - 8:46am
While I wouldn't ever suggest telling you wife about your feelings for another woman (you will hurt your situation more than possibly imaginable), you should be able to talk to her - you are not the first man in this position and you will definitely not be the last, but what makes a marriage survive this is the ability to communicate and the desire to be with your wife more than a girl at work you enjoy flirting with.
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
In reply to: haldace
Mon, 08-20-2007 - 12:38pm

Welcome to the board haldace,


Since this is the Ask the Relationship Saver board, are you asking how to save your marriage? Or looking for approval to have an affair?


Will your wife go to marriage counseling with you or read some good relationship books with you?


Five Love Languages, Gary Chapman