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Stay or Go
| Fri, 01-16-2004 - 4:45pm |
I really think this is it this time. You see we(Alex and I) go to lunch everyday and I called him yesterday twice (and left a message) and he did not call me back at all. I called him later that night at 7:30 and I asked him why he had not called me and he said he went to lunch with his friend. Which is fine with me, but I think he should of at least called to let me know since we go to lunch everyday together, right? Anyway we started arguing and he hung up on me. I called him right back and told him not to go to my house and he shows up with his kids. Well I gave him his bag that he had tat my house with all of his things in it and I asked him for my key and he left. The reason I think this is it is because it all happened in front of his kids. I do not think I exaggerated at all. The issue is not that he did not go to lunch with me, but that he did not call me knowing we go to lunch everyday, then when I confront him about it he hangs up on me. And this was an issue before (him choosing his friends over me) I figured he was busy at work, but I mean he left at 5 p.m. and he still did not call me. It took me calling him. He was planning on showing up at my house like nothing. Supposedly his New Years resolution is to treat me better. Yeah, that lasted a couple of weeks.
I am not sure what to do. I do not know if I should stay with him or not. We get along great and we have a lot of fun together. The reason I am confused is because we have been through this before. How much do I put up with? I do not want to get treated like I am 2nd in his life and his friends are first.

I am a strong beleiver that arguments in front of your children should be avoided at all costs.So, if he upset with you because you had the choice to resolve this in private and opted to hash it out in fron of the kids, then yes, he a right to be mad.
As for him putting his freinds before you.....How long have you dated?What do you consider to be excessive time spend with friends rather than you? Try to understand that this isnt about him not wanting to be with you, but wanting to hang out with his friends without guilt trips and giving him anultimatum on this, he might choose his buddies.
Just because you two go to lunch together daily, doesnt mean he relinqueshes his right to go with anyone else, with or without telling you beforehand.Ease up! One lunch apart wont kill you, infact some time apart might make you both appreciate each other more.
My advice to both of you as a couple is to pick you battles wisely, step back and take a better perspective on things, I think you'll both relaize things arent as bad as they seem.Enjoy each others company more and stop fighting over what compared to other things, is meaningless.The more time you spend fighting with him, the more time that goes by you can actually be enjoying each other.
Good luck,