A little background:
It's delusional for him to look at these episodes of violent behavior in his life and, instead of thinking HE might be the common denominator, blaming everyone else for exaggerating.
I think you should wait until your anger dies down and then talk with him during a time he is not upset. I would use these words:
"If you don't want to get counseling that's up to you, but this became a huge problem for me when you made me feel threatened physically. If you don't intend to make changes to your anger with a professional, I'm not going to stay in a house, or let my children stay in a house, where anger becomes physical. Please just do this for your family and for the sake of your job."
I was going to suggest that he go to EAP.
If thi is new behavior, then of course something is wrong with him.