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|Mon, 06-23-2014 - 3:37pm|
So I’m struggling. I have been with my BF for over 5 years and living with him and his parents for about 2 years. The house is pretty big and my BF and I have our own floor so we have our privacy, and we pay rent. About a year ago my BF’s brother had a baby. His brother and his girlfriend do not live together (don’t ask, I sure don’t) So when she works on the weekends, he brings his daughter to the grandparents’ house. At first it started with only Saturday from 10am to 9pm. Then it became Saturday and Sunday. Right now he pretty much brings the baby every day. This has become tough for me b/c it kind of changed the dynamic of our home. I love his niece and she loves me back. I just wasn’t prepared to do this every day especially when I come home from work and this beautiful little girl wants to play with me. Luckily I have my own floor to go to when I need a break. For the most part the burden falls on the grandparents to take care of her.
Last week, my boyfriend’s parents went on vacation for a week and the both of us were looking to spend some time together. We both even took days off from work to have the house to ourselves. But Monday came and guess who as at the house with the baby? It was his brother. I think this was my breaking point. I haven’t been able to get rid of this twitch in my eye.
Yes of course the brother is taking advantage. Yes of course the brother could bring his daughter to his own house and take care of her on his own. But he doesn’t. Both my BF and his parents have expressed how ridiculous his brother is but no one is willing to confront him. And it’s all putting me in a bad place! He’s created this urgency for me to move out the house. I resent my BF and his family for enabling this behavior. I resent my boyfriend for not having to guts to ask his brother for privacy. Somewhere I feel like I’m losing myself here. I feel hysterical because it’s not my place to confront him and I have to just “accept” this.
Yes we need to move out and that has been another one of my struggles. I have always tried to do the right thing and so I saved up all this cash with the hope of purchasing a home one day. Living in NYC has made that dream close to impossible for me. Apartments are too small and expensive and the houses on the outskirts of NYC are too far and expensive. I’ve been trying to accept just renting an apartment but I don’t know if I am making the right choice financially. But like I said before, I’m at a breaking point and I’m feeling quite hysterical. I have spoken to my BF, he tells me to hang in there and he gives me a Xanax. Speaking with my BF about money and real estate is fruitless b/c he doesn’t have a clue. But I need to get out. I don’t have the heart nor the patience for it anymore and I’m not happy and I feel stuck and depressed.