Stupid Sticky Situation!

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-15-2007
Stupid Sticky Situation!
7
Tue, 10-16-2007 - 2:08pm

I've never posted on a message board before, but I figured maybe it will help, so here I am! :)


I desperately need some advice on a pretty stick situation I've gotten myself in.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-30-2005
Tue, 10-16-2007 - 3:06pm

Welcome to the board Lia Kay,


Sit down with your mom some night and tell her that you want to talk to her about something really important. Then just tell her that you are back together, that you love him and want to marry him, and ask her if she can accept that. Since you live with her still, I think she might have a feeling something is going on.


Good luck.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-15-2007
Tue, 10-16-2007 - 3:09pm

I think she does know, pretty sure anyways! I was wondering how she couldn't but then I figured maybe I'm just good at sneaking around!

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-30-2005
Tue, 10-16-2007 - 3:16pm
Sometimes working up the courage is hard to do. But once you do it, you will feel better that it is out in the open.
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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-15-2007
Tue, 10-16-2007 - 9:25pm
If you really love this guy and want to be with him, which it sounds like you have determined you do, then you have to sit your mother down and tell her. It must be tearing you up inside not having her know now, and so however she reacts can only be a relief for you. If she doesn't accept the fact right away, chances are she loves you enough to allow the idea to grow on her. And if she does accept it then you can let your mind be at ease and have fun with the guy you love!
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-12-2005
Tue, 10-16-2007 - 10:15pm

My brother thought he was keeping something from our Mom about his girlfriend, basically he didn't know how to tell her his girlfriend had had a child and had never been married. My mom's pretty old-fashioned. Anyway, he was making himself sick over how to tell her, thinking he was going to disappoint her, break her heart, I dunno, he was acting so weird about it. Anyway, my sister finally couldn't stand it anymore and sat down with my Mom about it. Turns out my Mom knew all along but was waiting for my bro to step up to the plate, like she'd taught us.

They know. They always know. Chat with your Ma.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-16-2007
Tue, 10-16-2007 - 11:03pm

Ok so I know what you are going through. I was in a similar situation. I dated a guy my mom did not like and we broke up and she was happy. We got back together and I didn't want to tell her b/c I knew she wouldn't be happy. I was living with my parents at the time and I was basically lying to them bc I didnt wanna face my mom and tell her. I kept it secret for almost a year until I basically had to tell her. She was not happy at first but she learned to accept it and actually my bf and I are still together.


Sometimes moms are just trying to look out for whats best for you so it is hard for them to forgive the guy who maybe treated u badly. Best thing is come clean now and tell her that you do not want to disappoint her and your relationship with her is important. But also tell her that you are an adult and know whats best for yourself and even if it is a mistake, its yours to make. She may not be happy at first but she will hopefully learn to accept it. Also only talk good about your man in front of your mom even if you are mad a him. Good luck!

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-15-2007
Wed, 10-17-2007 - 8:48am

Thank you guys so much for the advice, I know what I should do and ya'll are right it is absolutely tearing me up inside, especially when I think of how the situation must feel for him to be in!