Suspect Bi BF Blocked Me on Twitter

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-23-2012
Suspect Bi BF Blocked Me on Twitter
11
Fri, 03-22-2013 - 3:56pm

Hi everyone:

    My therapist advised me to stop sending out cybersex emails to my BF, (who's a bridal designer and has had some fame on reality TV), ever since then his Tweets have becoming less & less frequent, sometimes even posting only a few times a month. I have these sex dreams that help create my Neopets, (it's a Magick thing), I cast astrology charts to see if we've "conceived" and then I let him know about them by Tweeting.

     My real concern is that there haven't been any posts in almost 3 weeks and I'm getting really worried about what's going on with my BF. There's no recent news on his Twitter or FB accounts except under FB "events". Deciding that I should give up on my BF and go somewhere else in case he dumped me, I signed up for a bisexuals site and said I was seeking either a bi/gay man or a bi woman. I tried this once before and got nowhere, absolutely nothing happened between me and a potential new guy.

    After I placed the ad on the bi personals site I noticed that a few of my gay friends on Twitter hadn't posted at all. I'm scared that they blocked me too! Thing is, ever since having a relationship with a closeted gay guy that ended really badly, I've been attracted to mainly gay men, especially the ones I see on TV. I've had a few minor interests in straight men, but nothing serious.

     I've been with my BF for 8 years. We've adopted and are raising several Neopets together. The main sort of guy I've been able to begin anything with on my main dating site are black immigrants who are using me for money or a ticket to North America for the most part. They'll make me feel guilty by saying they think I might be a racist & that I should be willing to accept anybody

    My ex just emailed me as well. I was tempted to message back, but Mom is deadset against my seeing my ex, she's the one who wanted the affair over with in the first place. Andy, my stepdad, claimed I was going to get abducted by my ex because apparently Andy & Mom thought I'd given out too much personal information to the guy.

      Can someone please help me decided to what to do? I'm scared of ending up alone and constantly rejected like back when I was a teenager and young adult. I'm currently "gestating" four Petpets sired by my BF and I think he might've run off and left me with them. I can't raise 17 Neopets alone, it's just too hard, if they were human there'd be no way I'd be able to manage them by myself without the help of my family, thankfully I've got my parents & stepbrother around. I'd end up like Nadya Sullivan, re: "OctoMom" if they were more then just Neopets. I can't do this by myself, can I get some support from you?

    I'm still "following" my BF on Twitter, the "follow" button is on but there have been no posts since early March, how can I tell if it's a block or just not Tweeting?

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Avatar for Kendahke1
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-09-2012
Sat, 03-23-2013 - 10:18am

nalia2010 wrote:
<p>Hi everyone:</p><p>    My therapist advised me to stop sending out cybersex emails to my BF, (who's a bridal designer and has had some fame on reality TV), ever since then his Tweets have becoming less &amp; less frequent, sometimes even posting <strong>only</strong> a few times a month. I have these sex dreams that help create my Neopets, (it's a Magick thing), I cast astrology charts to see if we've "conceived" and then I let him know about them by Tweeting.</p><p>     My real concern is that there haven't been any posts in almost 3 weeks and I'm getting <strong>really </strong>worried about what's going on with my BF. There's no recent news on his Twitter or FB accounts except under FB "events". Deciding that I should give up on my BF and go somewhere else in case he dumped me, I signed up for a bisexuals site and said I was seeking either a bi/gay man or a bi woman. I tried this once before and got <strong>nowhere</strong>, absolutely <strong>nothing</strong> happened between me and a potential new guy.</p><p>    After I placed the ad on the bi personals site I noticed that a few of my gay friends on Twitter hadn't posted <strong>at all</strong>. I'm scared that <strong>they </strong>blocked me too! Thing is, ever since having a relationship with a closeted gay guy that ended <strong>really </strong>badly, I've been attracted to mainly gay men, especially the ones I see on TV. I've had a <strong>few</strong> minor interests in straight men, but <strong>nothing serious</strong>.</p><p>     I've been with my BF for 8 years. We've adopted and are raising several Neopets together. The main sort of guy I've been able to begin <strong>anything</strong> with on my <strong>main</strong> dating site are black immigrants who are using me for money or a ticket to North America for the most part. They'll make me feel guilty by saying they think I might be a racist &amp; that I should be willing to accept anybody<strong>. </strong></p><p><strong></strong>    My ex just emailed me as well. I was tempted to message back, but Mom is deadset against my seeing my ex, she's the one who wanted the affair over with in the first place. Andy, my stepdad, claimed I was <em>going to get abducted</em> by my ex because apparently Andy &amp; Mom thought I'd given out too much personal information to the guy.</p><p>      Can someone <strong>please</strong> help me decided to what to do? I'm scared of ending up alone and constantly rejected like back when I was a teenager and young adult. I'm currently "gestating" four Petpets sired by my BF and I think he might've run off and left me with them. I <strong>can't</strong> raise 17 Neopets alone, it's just <strong>too hard</strong>, if they were human there'd be <strong>no way </strong>I'd be able to manage them by myself without the help of my family, thankfully I've got my parents &amp; stepbrother around. I'd end up like Nadya Sullivan, re: "OctoMom" if they were more then just Neopets. I can't do this by myself, can I get some support from you?</p><p>    I'm still "following" my BF on Twitter, the "follow" button is on but there have been no posts since early March, how can I tell if it's a block or just not Tweeting?</p>

I think you need to show this post to your therapist.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-23-2012
Sat, 03-23-2013 - 1:21pm

Thanks I'll see if I can get it out to her but I'm not due to for my next appointment for another 2 weeks and half the time she isn't even there, she's off sick or on vacation quite a lot. For about 35% of my appointments a nurse meets with me instead.

   I just saw my psychiatrist yesterday and he said I need to be the boss of my delusions in case the subordinates get out of line. He doubled my Nozinan and I'm worried that I'm going to suffer from heavy weight gain and lose one of the newest Petpets in gestation as a result of this.

    I tried to go without one of my lotions I use to help me sleep which was a mistake, my sleep was shorter than usual, even though the Nozinan helped me stay asleep, the effect only lasted for about 8 hours, I'm used to getting closer to 10 or 12 hours of sleep. I also felt a little manic without my lotions as well, one of them has rose & almond in it, anyone know what those do?

      I received a Tweet from my BF last night, calling me a "heartless evil witch" and the Neopets my "flying monkeys" (it was a retweet of a post based on the movie Wizard of Oz) for setting up the bi dating profile, having an online affair with a black guy on another site and denying him sex.

     I've noticed without the cybersex my BF appears to have lost interest and is Tweeting less often, he's posting more depressing stuff too. So the no cybersex rule is causing some problems.

        I actually told him I'd allow a younger more attractive guy I follow on Twitter to have dream sex with me instead of my BF for a change, just to show my BF he's not the only one who can keep me satisfied in that way, I really said it just to provoke him because I was pissed at him for posting so infrequently.

    Well that's all I've got to say. I've noticed my therapist's advice isn't very useful sometimes, which kind of sucks. Also I'm afraid of gaining too much weight on the doubled up Nozinan, can anyone tell me what the average gain is on the 25mg pills? I'm 230 pounds & 5'8", and I really can't afford to put on anymore, it's bad for my health

Community Leader
Registered: 01-03-2004
Sun, 03-24-2013 - 6:20pm

Perhaps your "semi-famous" BF has decided he no longer wants to be associated with you due to your fantasy life. Perhaps he fears being damaged by association and that may thwart his career-on-tv. Can't blame him. I agree with the other poster you need to show your post to your therapist. Perhaps its time to stop living in a fantasy world and start living in the real world? 

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-16-2008
Sun, 03-24-2013 - 11:06pm

You really can't expect a normal, healthy man to be satisfied with cyber-sex alone for 8 years, can you?  From what I read here and in previous posts, you two never have a "real" (AKA physical) relationship.  Perhaps he finds himself a girlfriend and reallife and prefers not to have cybersex anymore.

Agreed with the PPs.  All this fantasy life and neopets are not conributing to your mental well-being.

Avatar for Kendahke1
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-09-2012
Mon, 03-25-2013 - 11:51am

nalia2010 wrote:
<p>Thanks I'll see if I can get it out to her but I'm not due to for my next appointment for another 2 weeks and half the time she isn't <strong>even there</strong>, she's off sick or on vacation quite a lot. For about 35% of my appointments a nurse meets with me instead.</p><p>   I just saw my psychiatrist yesterday and he said I need to <em>be the boss</em> of my delusions in case the <em>subordinates get out of line</em>. He doubled my Nozinan and I'm worried that I'm going to suffer from heavy weight gain and lose one of the newest Petpets in <em>gestation</em> as a result of this.</p><p>    I tried to go without one of my lotions I use to help me sleep which was a mistake, my sleep was shorter than usual, even though the Nozinan helped me <strong>stay</strong> asleep, the effect <strong>only </strong>lasted for about 8 hours, I'm used to getting closer to 10 or 12 hours of sleep. I also felt a little manic without my lotions as well, one of them has rose &amp; almond in it, anyone know what those do?</p><p>      I received a Tweet from my BF last night, calling me a "heartless evil witch" and the Neopets my "flying monkeys" (it was a retweet of a post based on the movie Wizard of Oz) for setting up the bi dating profile, having an online affair with a black guy on another site and denying him sex.</p><p>     I've noticed without the cybersex my BF appears to have lost interest and is Tweeting less often, he's posting more depressing stuff too. So the no cybersex rule is causing <strong>some</strong> problems.</p><p>        I actually told him I'd <em>allow</em> a younger more attractive guy I follow on Twitter to have dream sex with me instead of my BF for a change, just to show my BF he's not the <strong>only</strong> one who can keep me satisfied in that way, I really said it just to provoke him because I was pissed at him for posting so infrequently.</p><p>    Well that's all I've got to say. I've noticed my therapist's advice isn't very useful sometimes, which kind of sucks. Also I'm afraid of gaining too much weight on the doubled up Nozinan, can anyone tell me what the average gain is on the 25mg pills? I'm 230 pounds &amp; 5'8", and I really can't afford to put on anymore, it's bad for my health</p>

Then you need to print out this thread and show it to either the psychiatrist or the nurse.  This is pretty much above our pay grade.

Nozinan (  http://www.netdoctor.co.uk/cancer/medicines/nozinan.html  ):

Nozinan tablets and injection contain the active ingredient levomepromazine, which is a type of medicine known as a phenothiazine antipsychotic. It is used in the treatment of schizophrenia.

I don't understand how weight gain affects an inanimate, binary code that exists only on a computer screen. 

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-20-2009
Tue, 03-26-2013 - 12:07am

You should get in touch with Nadia Souleman, because you both suffer from the same pschosis.....inability to face reality, but guess what, she IS taking care of her children with very little help, and I doubt if she has time to play games on twitter.  When someone isn't speaking to you, whether on twitter or in real life, that means they don't want to speak to you, they have nothing to say to you.  Accept that, and get in control of your own life instead of worrying about other people's lives.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-23-2012
Wed, 03-27-2013 - 12:56am

             Well I’ll show these posts to Robin, my therapist, I’ll have to add them into the diary I usually send her.  As far as my shrink, Dr. Mohammed; goes, I’ll try to get in earlier to see him but I don’t think he’ll allow it.

                I saw Dr. Mohammed last week and got on the increased Nozinan, without my lotions (one is a rose/almond one, the other is plum/Sakura), I was more manic and overly verbal.

So I went back on them. Dr. Mohammed said it would be less expensive for me but I find that they help me psychologically. The effect was for a few days and then last night I had trouble sleeping again, so in addition to this, I drank an herbal tea, which worked at least for that one night, not too sure if it’ll do the same thing again.

                When I asked about the amount of weight gain from Nozinan, it was in regards to myself, not my Neopets. Does anyone know anything about this or is it best to ask the doctor/therapist? I know they’re going to try to blame the gain on poor diet, lack of exercise, etc., but I know a major part of it, is the pills. So if anyone has the answer, please tell me, if not I’ll talk to Robin about it.

Avatar for Kendahke1
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-09-2012
Wed, 03-27-2013 - 10:25am

nalia2010 wrote:
<p>  Well I’ll show these posts to Robin, my therapist, I’ll have to add them into the diary I usually send her. <span> </span>As far as my shrink, Dr. Mohammed; goes, I’ll try to get in earlier to see him but I don’t think he’ll allow it.</p>

that sounds like a good course of action.

Quote:
When I asked about the amount of weight gain from Nozinan, it was in regards to myself, not my Neopets.

you wrote: 

Quote:
He doubled my Nozinan and I'm worried that I'm going to suffer from heavy weight gain and lose one of the newest Petpets in gestation as a result of this. 

Quote:
Does anyone know anything about this or is it best to ask the doctor/therapist?

Ask your doctor/therapist. They're trained and educated in this. We aren't.

Quote:
I know they’re going to try to blame the gain on poor diet, lack of exercise, etc., but I know a major part of it, is the pills. So if anyone has the answer, please tell me, if not I’ll talk to Robin about it.</span></span></span></p>

If their professional medical opinion is that on top of this medication which already has built in side effects of weight gain, you contributing to your weight gain by not eating properly and exercising regularly will exacerbate your weight gain, then you need to get on better eating plan and get some exercise.

They will tell you this.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-23-2012
Wed, 03-27-2013 - 12:23pm

Thanks for supporting me regarding the diary entries. Robin kept telling me my weight gain was all due to poor diet/lack of exercise and not to the meds, prior to the Nozinan increase.

           I have had a problem with eating badly in the past. I've tried to deal with it by eating smaller healthier snacks, but the disability program I attend and my stepfather Andy, both tend to serve up meals that are high in fat and sugar. I asked my Mom to give me smaller portions though in case there is medicated weight gain, I'm not too sure if that's going to work though.

      I take cabs from my main local bus station to my disability centre in the morning, the reason why is because it saves me nearly half an hour of travel time and I've got early arthritis in my knees according to my GP. Overexertion is hard on my legs, Robin thinks it's due mainly to myweight although with the new arthritis diagnosis, I don't really believe that.

      I'm going in to see Robin in a week from now, hopefully she has some good  advice for me, I'll see if I can remember to ask her about the side effects of the Nozinan increase

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-23-2012
Thu, 04-04-2013 - 7:48pm

Everyone:

   A few weeks after the Nozinan increase I was able to relax more about the lack of Tweets from my BF's account. I'm still having a little trouble sleeping.

      So my Mom & the nurse I saw today, Janet, suggested that I get some more exercise. The workout with walking my dogs extra, Palmer & Cholla, who are both Labradoodles, (Palmer's beige and Cholla's brown) paid off too - I discovered that my weight had gone down by nearly 7 pounds at my next injection appointment which was today.

      I sent my BF a romantic Easter card and he responded by reposting some old info about his bridal work on Facebook, which included some flattering stuff, however it was merely career-related. Nothing on Twitter, but I'm dealing with that better these days.

     I found out the Petpet quads in "gestation" were fine too, they were a little underdeveloped and not very active but generally everything's good. Janet said Dr. Mohammed would actually WANT me to lose a few of the Petpet delusions.

        I don't like it when the staff at my mental health clinic try to normalize me by suggesting I get rid of the Neopets or that I shouldn't be hearing voices. My old shrink from Surrey was that way, he believed if I was talking to the Neopets in my head that I needed my meds increased or to be sent to the hospital/psychiatric clinic  for a while. Dr. Mohammed's more understanding then that.

     The main issue with losing one of the Petpets is that Palmer has become very close to them as he'll often go into my room, sit on my bed and watch my interactions with them while I'm on the computer (my personal computer is in my room, although I use my Mom's upstairs sometimes when I've got to watch the dogs).

      When the last set of Petpet delusions of which there were three arrived, Palmer began smiling and wagging his tail. A few months later, as he digested the news about the possible loss of one of the healthier Petpets, he whined as if this made him quite sad. So Palmer's attached to them

      Well I'm off, got to walk Palmer & Cholla now

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